The Arwing on the Lawn (On Hiatus)
by RainbowNoms
Summary: Two teenagers plan a bike ride for a sunny June morning. But, it goes the way of your average psychic fair: cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. And frankly, these circumstances are quite extraordinary. Rated T for language and possible destruction of canon.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Herro there! If you're reading this, that means you've stumbled upon the weird, weird world of my brain! This idea has been sitting between my ears for a long time (of course, without the Naruto business), but it took me a while to figure out a way to suitably extend the first chapter. Not to be outdone, my brain said to me one night, "What if you threw Kiba in there just for the hell of it?" So, I did. Also, if you're expecting something serious, with a twisty plotline and gory details, then you've come to the wrong place. Just wanted to give you that warning. Enjoy!**

* * *

An alarm clock shook a 15-year-old and a 14-year-old out of their dreams. The 15 year old on the bottom felt around haphazardly on the nightstand, searching for the alarm clock. Unfortunately, he only succeeded in knocking an empty glass into the trash can.

The _thump _noise scared the teenager from his "5-more-minutes" mentality, and he rolled over so he could see the clock. It read 7:00 AM.

"Turn it off, goddammit!" a groggy voice yelled from the top bunk.

Jacob hit the off button about 2 seconds later. He sat up on the cramped bottom bunk, trying to remember why on Earth he set a 7 o'clock wake up time during summer vacation. The answer hit him as if the top bunk had fallen down on top of him.

_That's right, I planned that bike ride for this morning, _Jacob recalled.

Jacob stood up next to the beds, attempting to stretch. Several cracks emanating from his body signified that he was successful. He unconsciously scratched his ass. Jacob stared at the wall sleepily for about a minute for seemingly no reason.

Then, he turned around to face the bunks. A figure was still lying on his side, facing away from Jacob, occupying the top bunk. He scowled. He hated when the 14-year-old was this lazy.

"Get up, you lazy dog-boy!" Jacob commanded, shaking him rather violently.

The figure rolled over, exposing his face. It was a rather tan face, with messy dark brown hair laying in all directions. His eyes, which looked like slits, had anger written all over them. Red, fang shaped tattoos occupied his cheeks.

"Calm down, man, I was working on it," Kiba said, appearing to take the high road for once.

Jacob stared at him for a moment. _I'll just leave it at that,_ he thought while turning towards his dresser for some clothes. Kiba's hot temper was something Jacob did not want to deal with at this time in the morning.

Rustling behind him told Jacob that Kiba was fulfilling his promise. Jacob dug through his drawer, looking for something suitable for bike riding. Kiba jumped out of his bed behind Jacob, and nearly fell over due to random tunnel vision. Jacob caught this out of the corner of his eye.

"Morning, Graceful," Jacob joked.

"Just shut up," Kiba said, too tired to make a proper retort.

After a moment of thought, Jacob picked out his blue "Stumpy's Brewery and Restaurant" shirt. He opened the drawer beneath it and pulled out the top pair of shorts, which were simply black and white athletic shorts.

He threw both articles of clothing on and shut his drawers in one motion.

Kiba started rustling through his dresser as Jacob went towards the door to make breakfast. Suddenly, a growing white dog barked happily from the top bunk.

"Oh, hi, Akamaru," Jacob greeted in an equally happy tone. He scratched the dog's ears and head. Akamaru's tail whipped around furiously and happily.

_Ah, this brightens my day,_ Jacob thought. Akamaru was always so happy, and he projected that on everyone else.

Jacob opened the door and walked down the hallway, taking a right towards the kitchen. It was illuminated with the morning sunlight through the blinds, so there was no need to turn the light on.

_Fuck, I don't feel like making cereal…Poptarts it is…_

He grabbed the "S'mores" box and pulled it open, removing a pack of two.

_Forget the toaster. It makes them take longer and taste worse._

So Jacob simply sat down at the table, opened the two-pack, and began to munch.

Not long after, Akamaru trotted in, followed by Kiba in his trademark fuzzy sweatshirt and grey shorts. He walked across the kitchen, took another two-pack from the open box, and shoved both into the toaster. He leaned casually against the counter in wait.

"Why do we have to get up so early just to ride bikes?" Kiba asked after about 30 seconds.

"Well, would you rather ride in 65 degree weather or 95 degree weather? I mean, it's not like this heat wave is gonna break anytime soon," Jacob pointed out.

"Whatever. I still say this is something that can be saved for noon," Kiba said defiantly.

"Complain all you want, but you and I both know you love that bike."

"True, but what I don't love is waking up to an alarm clock."

At the moment Kiba finished his sentence, the toaster popped and he nearly fell over from surprise. Jacob couldn't help but snicker loudly.

"Well, if you weren't awake then, you are now!" Jacob spat out in between laughs.

Suffice it to say, breakfast was finished in silence.

Jacob got up and threw the little tinfoil wrapper away.

"Well," Jacob began nervously, knowing perfectly well what could happen if he angered Kiba any more. "I'm gonna go pump up my tires."

He quietly exited the kitchen out of the other side and reached the door. Right as he was about to unlock the door…

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE—

The most earsplitting sound possible broke the awkward silence created by insulting Kiba. Not only that, but the ground shook as if an 8.0 magnitude earthquake was happening under the house.

Jacob fell to his hands and knees, trying to keep himself steady. A comparatively soft thump told him that Kiba had fallen out of his chair.

Jacob rolled onto his side, covering his ears to shield himself from the sound as much as is humanly possible. Akamaru whimpered continuously while dashing around the house in fear.

Suddenly, it seemed as if the sound was getting softer…

_Ok, so either the sound IS getting softer, or I've gone deaf._

Jacob took a hand off of one of his ears. The sound of metal grinding against an immovable surface had ended.

After a moment; "Good Lord, what on Corneria was that?" Jacob asked out loud, slightly glad that he could still hear himself.

"Holy shit! That sounded like a cross between an air horn and an off-key guitar!" Kiba stated as he climbed into a sitting position. He then got a look on his face that said he was pondering something. Jacob didn't have to wait long to find out what it was.

"Wait, did you seriously just say 'What on Corneria' instead of 'What on Earth?' Are you that obsessed with Star Fox?"

Jacob just sat there, realizing he actually said "What on Corneria."

"Well, when a man loves a game very much…" Jacob tried to explain, a nervous expression on his face. He obviously failed. Kiba just rolled his eyes.

"No. Just….no," he said.

_I still can't believe I just said that…_ Jacob thought.

Jacob got up and walked over towards the front window.

"It's alright, Akamaru, you're fine, you're fine," Jacob heard Kiba cooing. Given what just happened, that action made complete sense.

_But still, who or what the fuck made such a terrible sound?_

Jacob opened the shade on the main front window to examine for noisemakers. What he saw was definitely not what he expected.

"Uhh…Kiba? For how long has there been an Arwing on the front lawn…?" Jacob asked quite truthfully.

"Jacob, get Star Fox outta your head, man. I'm sick of it," Kiba retorted.

"Kiba, I'm being entirely serious."

"Sure you are," he said sarcastically.

"I am."

"Sure you are."

_Well, this is getting nowhere. Time for a new tactic._

"Ok, I give. You didn't fall for it," Jacob said, trying reverse psychology.

"I thought so."

"Now come on, let's get our bikes out."

"Finally."

Kiba walked into the living room, Akamaru in tow. As he glanced out the window, his jaw visibly dropped to the floor.

"Told you," Jacob said simply.

Kiba was at a loss for words. All he could utter was monosyllabic dribble. An Arwing was indeed sitting halfway on the lawn, halfway on the street. The jet was facing their house. Various bits of metal were blowing in the wind, resting on the ground, or hanging off the Arwing itself. Small grass fires were popping up behind it. The fuselage appeared to be the only thing undamaged.

Jacob let the realization sink into Kiba as he put his sandals on. He opened the front door. Kiba was still rooted to the spot, even as Akamaru nudged his leg.

"Well, are you coming, or are you just gonna stand there in your self-induced trance?" Jacob asked. Kiba shook, as if remembering that time was still moving forward.

"Just…shit," Kiba remarked as he went for his sandals. "Guess I should've paid more attention to you and your furriness."

"No time for regrets now, let's just move."

"Akamaru, stay here a moment," Kiba commanded. Jacob nodded.

The two boys exited the house at the end of the street, and immediately realized how lucky they were. The tip of the Arwing had stopped at most five feet from the front of the house. The entire neighborhood was bathed in silence. Not even a bird chirped.

"Jesus Christ…" Jacob started.

"…that was close," Kiba finished.

_Well, if there's a plane, there must be a pilot…_ both of them reasoned.

Jacob continued to lead the way. He climbed onto the tip and slowly made his way towards the cockpit. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the Star Fox logo still visible on both of the wings.

_Or what's left of them anyway…_

A groaning of metal announced Kiba's presence on the crippled Arwing. Both human teenagers stood in front of the cockpit, but the cracked and tinted glass prevented them from seeing the figure inside.

"So…what now?" Kiba asked.

Jacob wasn't really listening, however. He got down on all fours. He slowly raised one arm, lightly touching the spidered glass.

Almost instantly, the front pane fell apart.

_How anticlimactic. _

On the other hand, Kiba and Jacob could now see the pilot. An orange vulpine was slumped over to the side in the cockpit chair, eyes closed, one hand resting weakly on the yoke. The microphone on his head was askew, held on only by one of his ears. Blood was leaking from the corners of his mouth onto his green combat vest.

"Is he…dead…?" Kiba asked, obviously worried. Jacob, having the same concern, examined Fox closely. After a few moments, he could see Fox's chest rise and fall slowly.

"Nah…he's just been knocked out," Jacob said, relieved. "We still gotta get him out, though.

Kiba nodded in agreement

Jacob began to reach in. Suddenly, he was forced flat on his stomach by a heavy, limp weight that had come out of the sky. The arm still in the cockpit bent down in an attempt to steady Jacob, but only succeeded in hitting a couple buttons.

Kiba saw a grey, blue, and black mass fall right on top of Jacob's lower back, squishing him against the cold, hard metal of the Arwing. Kiba cringed.

_Ow. Damn,_ he thought

"Uuuuuaaaaagh.." Jacob moaned in pain.

Kiba examined the furry on top of Jacob. He had landed facedown, and also appeared to be unconscious. He had grey fur with a spiked white mohawk over the top of his head, spiked shoulder pads, a blue vest with black armored sleeves extending out from underneath it, and black pants with matching boots. His tail was white-tipped, bushy, and had a split at the end.

"What…the hell…?" Jacob uttered weakly. "Kiba, what's…what's on top of me…?"

_Shit, what's this guy's name? I can't remember…what do I say? What do I say?_

"Can't remember his name, but I'll tell you this much. I think God decided to double the furriness," he answered.

_What the fuck did he just say? _Jacob asked himself.

"Just get him or it off me, ok? I can barely breathe," Jacob ordered.

Kiba grabbed the lupine by his torso, and heaved. Slowly but surely, he began to roll over, revealing his face. His eyes were closed as well, but one of them was covered with something that looked sort of like a high-tech eye patch. He also seemed to have an angrier look on his face.

"God, he's heavy," Kiba complained between breaths.

"Yeah, try being squished by him," Jacob replied, glad that he was getting his movement back.

Kiba had to roll him over twice to get him off of Jacob completely, so the lupine was facedown again. Jacob stood back up, and nearly fell back over due to some pain in his chest.

"Ugh, that'll be sore for a while," Jacob said to himself. He spat into his hand.

_No blood. That's a good sign,_ he thought, rubbing his hand on his shorts.

"Thanks, Kiba," Jacob said, turning around so they were face to face. Kiba was staring at something at his feet. Jacob followed his line of sight.

"Oh, that's what you meant," he said, looking at Wolf O'Donnell's unconscious form. "His name's Wolf, by the way."

Kiba thought for a moment. "Geez, are all Star Fox characters named so…uh…what's the best word…obviously?"

Jacob couldn't help but laugh. "You know, I never really thought about that until you brought it up."

"It's just…a fox name Fox, a wolf named Wolf…did all originality go out the window?"

"Well, the last names are original," Jacob pointed out.

"Whatever, man, I still think they could've done better."

"Let's just focus on getting them off this death trap of an Arwing," Jacob said, not wanted to argue about character names. "I mean, it's not my fault that humans give their animals more badass specie names."

"True. If I saw a human named Human, I'd laugh my ass off."

Jacob smiled in agreement. He turned back to the cockpit and once again reached inside. Eyebrows furrowed with determination, he undid the safety restraint keeping Fox in his chair.

The human took a deep breath. Then, summoning all his strength and adrenaline, he grabbed the unconscious vulpine on both sides, and heaved.

Fox was a little lighter than Jacob had expected, yet it still took a few seconds to get him out of the cockpit. Jacob laid him down gently next to Wolf.

Jacob slouched over, suddenly exhausted. He breathed heavily and deeply. Kiba stared from across the two unconscious Cornerians. A truck rumbled down the interstate 4 blocks from the house.

"So…what are we gonna do with these two?" Kiba asked, poking Wolf with his foot.

"The way I see it…" Jacob began, still unsure how to continue. "…the least we could do is take them into the A/C and let them wake up on their own."

_Hopefully we won't get blaster'd to death in some kind of panic._

"It'll be one hell of a chore to get them inside. Especially with Wolf," Kiba stated.

"Yup. On that note, who should we take first? Fox or Wolf?" Jacob asked.

"Probably Fox, he'll be easier," Kiba answered, noting the large differences in height and muscle mass.

"Yeah, but if we do Wolf first, Fox will seem like a feather when we come back."

"But then we'd be all tired out by the time we got back. Come on, let's take Fox first."

"Are we seriously arguing about this?"

"Yeah, now come on, help me take Fox first."

"I still think we should take Wolf first…" but Kiba was already grabbing Fox by the arms. Jacob realized how futile it would be to continue to insist on taking Wolf into the house first. Kiba was always the stubborn one. "…but whatever…"

Jacob grabbed Fox underneath his knees while Kiba shifted his grip to Fox's back. His tail hung limply between the two humans, bouncing slightly with each step. To Jacob, that was a little saddening. He never thought of Fox being in such a helpless state.

As for Kiba, he didn't really understand why Jacob looked so solemn. People fall unconscious from injuries all the time, it was nothing really new to the Inuzuka kid. Being a ninja, Kiba had gotten desensitized to injury.

_I wonder how often Jacob has seen injury and physical harm this bad, _he thought.

"Careful, slowly, careful," Jacob cautioned unnecessarily for the third time. The two humans maneuvered their way off the space plane and back towards the house. The door posed an bigger obstacle than they originally thought.

"Hang on, let me turn towards the door," Jacob grunted out his order. Shifting his right hand towards Fox's rear, Jacob hoped to reach out with his left hand and turn the doorknob so they could get in. Jacob's knees bent, trying to balance the extra weight now located on one side. His hand inched closer and closer to the knob. Right before his body gave out, he twisted the doorknob. The door swung open easier than expected, and Jacob changed his grip back to both arms under the knees.

It was right there that Kiba decided to give his two cents:

"You know I left that door unlatched, right?"

Rage. Blind, furious rage coarsed through Jacob's veins at this statement. He began to shake. He had no idea what to say. This is the best he could come up with:

"Then why don't YOU go first?!" Jacob growled.

"Uh...ok?" Kiba responded, moving around to Jacob's other side sheepishly.

"Sheesh, if I wasn't holding an unconscious supposed video game character in my arms, I'd kick your ass right here..." Jacob grumbled.

"You think you can kick my ass? Yeah, right."

"Try me," Jacob taunted as they moved Fox through the open door. This was accompanied by the meanest scowl Jacob ever mustered.

Kiba surrendered his pride. Akamaru, meanwhile, took a defensive stance against Fox, sniffing his tail and pacing around the trio.

"Where are we gonna put him?" Kiba questioned.

"Lay him down on the couch, that should work for now."

Kiba and Jacob moved left of the doorway. Fox was gently set down on the green couch underneath the front window, his body facing the TV by the door. The two stood there for a few seconds, resting their arms and admiring the scene in front of them. There was an Arwing in their small Omaha, Nebraska neighborhood. A freaking Arwing.

_This one-ups a ninja from an anime by hundreds of times, _Jacob thought to himself. _Naruto is a great TV show, but Star Fox will always be better. Furriness is greater than ninja-ness._

Kiba didn't waste much time getting back to Wolf, but Jacob wanted to change something first. He took Fox's tail and let it rest between his legs, on which he bent the knees slightly upwards. Akamaru looked on curiously, noticing his master's friend's caring attitude towards the mysterious creature.

_I think that's the most comfortable way to do it, _Jacob thought to himself. Then, he realized what a ridiculous action he just performed. _And, I can't believe I just cared so much about a furry's comfort._

Jacob laughed at himself as he followed Kiba back out the door to bring Wolf in. The Inuzuka was staring at Wolf's face intently for some reason as Jacob climbed back onto the Arwing. Kiba noted Jacob's presence with a glance. Kiba's expression changed from one of focus to one of fear.

"You know what? I think I'm gonna let you take the torso this time..." Kiba suggested with a decreasing pitch in voice.

"Ok? Why?" Jacob asked, confused.

"It's just...I don't wanna be the first one he sees if he wakes up, I mean...look at those wicked claws..."

Jacob couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Oh, so confident against me, but can't handle little Wolfie here? Is that it?" Jacob taunted, working on his revenge.

"Well, you're a human with barely any formal training in fighting, who's also only an inch taller than me and doesn't have much muscle mass," Kiba explained.

_Ow. That destroyed my self-esteem._

_"_And this guy...well...he's like six-foot-three, has two-inch sharp claws sticking out of his gloves, and his shoulders are about as broad as his shoulder pads. I don't wanna fight this guy even if he's sleeping."

"Just grab his legs, you scaredy-cat, and stop explaining how Wolf is so much better than me in every way."

"Just sayin'," Kiba finished nonchalantly.

The two humans took their positions next to Wolf.

"Ok, on 3, we lift like we've never lifted before," Jacob instructed. "one...two..._three!_"

The two heaved upwards at Wolf's limp form. With their arms bulging and their throats grunting, slowly Wolf began to rise off the Arwing.

"Alright, let's move," Jacob grunted out, teeth bared in concentration. The two teenager's legs moved forward by mere inches with each step. Yet, it was progress. With each step, the lupine seemed to get heavier, but the distance was shorter.

"Geez...maybe...maybe you were right..." Kiba managed to say between heavy breaths. They carefully made their way off the Arwing's tip for the final time. Jacob nearly fell over when Kiba stepped down, yet miraculously kept his balance. After that moment of terror, his brain was able to process what Kiba just said.

"Yeah, that...that realization would've been helpful...five minutes ago..." Jacob said, amazed he could make such a long sentence while lifting the beast that was Wolf O'Donnell.

"Let's...get this over with," Kiba said as they inched through the doorway.

_Glad I thought to leave that open,_ Jacob and Kiba thought simultaneously.

"To the recliner..." Kiba ordered, motioning towards the tan armchair opposite the couch occupied by Fox. Akamaru was braver this time, sniffing Wolf's limp tail and boots furiously. He must have sensed something off about Wolf, though, because he backed off and continued eyeing Fox. Jacob and Kiba barely noticed any of that.

"Nnnnnngh," the humans grunted as they laid Wolf down on the recliner. They collapsed on the floor, exhausted but glad they were done moving unconscious bodies. They laid there for several minutes, letting their limbs sprawl out in all directions. A weak breeze blew in though the still open front door.

"We did a good thing," Kiba said.

"Yes, we did," Jacob agreed. They could hear cars skidding to a halt on the street, obviously unsure what to think of the mildly flaming Arwing where there used to be a "T" intersection. Van doors opened and closed. Incessant voices filled the air. Kiba got up and closed the front door. Silence was restored. Sunlight continued to filter through the window. Kiba laid back down on the floor.

_What are we gonna tell them when they wake up, though? Who knows how they'll react. Hell, who knows when they'll wake up? That's probably more important._

All kinds of best and worst case scenarios ran through Jacob's mind at light speed. Everything from simple peacemaking and realization to a shootout in the living room with the humans as casualties was present. Some of them were gory, some of them were funny, and some of them were just plain weird.

_The fact of the matter is that there are a lot of ways for shit to go down._

"You know what, Kiba?" Jacob said.

"Hmm?" he turned his head to the side to see Jacob's face.

"I think that moving them was the easy part. I think the real fun has just begun."

* * *

**A/N: Well? You likey? If so, yay! If not, well, consider purchasing a bullet-proof vest the next time you're out shopping. Cause things could get ugly. (JK, you know I still love you guys.) I also have two other projects in the works, one will be a oneshot, the other, full-length, but equally stupid. So, keep an eye out for those! (One last thing. I'll try to be as consistent as I can with updating, but I can't guarantee anything, what with school and split custody dominating my life. Just don't lose hope in me. That's all I ask.) Happy Reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow, this chapter turned out longer than I expected. And I'm a little proud of myself for that. Anyway, I won't keep you from Jacob and Kiba's adventures any longer. Enjoy the new chapter!**

* * *

"You know what I just realized?" one guy posed, taking a sip of Amp Energy.

"What's that?" he asked back, opening his own can of Amp.

"It's been exactly one year since I found out you weren't a fictional character."

The wolfish boy cocked his head to the side in thought. His eyes glazed over as he searched his memory. The calendar date, June 8th, rolled through his brain.

"You know, you're right," Kiba realized. "I hadn't really thought about that until now."

The two of them fell silent for a little bit, thinking about events from the past year, to the past month, to the past week, to yesterday, to just this morning, where they pulled an anthropomorphic fox from his disabled spaceship. Of course, it was none other than Fox McCloud, unconscious and helpless in his crippled Arwing. Wolf was there too, strange as that sounds. He used Jacob as a landing pad. Jacob's back was still sore.

"I guess we haven't had much time to think this morning, have we?" Kiba continued, having a relatively rare moment of calmness and clarity.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Jacob answered, taking another sip of his energy drink.

The two humans were sitting on the floor, backs propped up against the base of the couch. All the upholstery in the living room was taken up by unconscious Lylatians; Fox laying back on said couch, Wolf kind of lolling back in the recliner across from the three. It was an...interesting sight to say the least. And it turns out that when Lylatians are knocked out, their tails and ears continue to twitch. Just slightly. Jacob found it creepy. But it was true.

Earlier, as if a flaming Arwing on the front lawn wasn't enough proof, Jacob and Kiba had been, well, for lack of a better word, _petting _Fox and Wolf, just to see if they really were furries, and not some sort of elaborate hoax. Crazy as it sounds, they pulled at Wolf's neck to make sure it wasn't just a headpiece.

_In hindsight, that was an extraordinarily silly notion, _Jacob had realized. Then they had grabbed their energy drinks and sat down on the floor.

"I still remember that day clearly," Jacob remarked. "A cool yet sunny day it was. I woke up around 9 in the morning, Robbie, Malachi, and Aaron showed up around 11 for a game of 2 versus 2 football..."

"Yeah, yeah, you've told the story many times, no need to tell it again," Kiba interrupted with a smile. That was true, but it was an off the wall story.

"Sorry, sorry, it's just...fun memories," Jacob reminisced, taking yet another sip of his favorite energy drink. He couldn't tell his story out loud anymore, but he could still relive it in his mind.

_The football game had ended, everyone had adjourned for lunch, and I noticed this howling coming from my backyard. I let my Hot Pocket finish cooking in the microwave, then I checked out the backyard. The howling had been coming from behind the shed in the back left corner of the rectangular space. I crawled back there to find Kiba, unconscious with a big lump on his head, but otherwise unharmed. Akamaru had been howling the whole time, sounding out a distress call._

Jacob smiled at the next event that had taken place. He began to snicker.

"What's so funny?" Kiba questioned.

"Oh, it's just the fact that you nearly bit my finger off when I tried to wake you up using Hot Pocket smell."

"Oh, yeah...you know, I still can't eat a Hot Pocket because of that."

"Not my fault."

"But what _was_ your fault was when you kicked my balls and face in one go."

"You pinned me against a tree," Jacob said, wondering if Kiba had forgotten this important detail.

"And…?"

"You thought I would just sit there and let you choke me?"

"I wasn't choking you."

"Don't lie, dog-boy, you were choking me."

"I wasn't choking you! I was just gripping your neck tightly so I could get some answers."

"That's called choking, in case you didn't know. And it's rather frowned upon."

"But my manhood? You couldn't just go for my jaw?"

"I was aiming for your jaw; your so-called 'manhood'"-Jacob made air-quotes-"was in the way."

Kiba scoffed at this notion. He took a swig of his Amp.

"Besides, what would you do if you were me?" Jacob asked matter-of-factly.

"That's easy. I'd sic Akamaru on your sorry ass," Kiba said confidently with that eyes-closed grin that he loved to make.

Jacob rolled his eyes. He looked around the living room out of boredom. A piano was right of the recliner. It hadn't been used in years, or at least not since Jacob had quit his piano lessons. Further to the right was the hallway. Something seemed to be missing, though. Something small, white, and hyperactive. Something that always seemed to be smiling and wagging his tail, even if things were rough.

"Speaking of which," Jacob wondered. "Where is Akamaru? I haven't seen him since we left the house to investigate the Arwing."

"Eh, he's probably eating, or napping in your bed, or something like that," Kiba said rather casually.

"You're probably right," Jacob noted. "Still, I wonder what he would think of Fox and Wolf…"

Kiba left that thought unfinished. They sat in silence for around 5 minutes, taking swigs of their energy drink. Jacob began to think to the future. He wasn't sure how his train of thought headed in that direction, yet it had happened anyway.

_It'll be good when they wake up and get their bearings again, but…what then?_

It was similar to the earlier thoughts about peacemaking and shootouts, but Jacob did his best to push that out of his mind. Instead, he was more worried about how his dad would react.

_It was hard enough convincing him to take Kiba into the family, and even then, he still treats Kiba pretty coldly sometimes. Even after a year. And now fate makes me ask even more out of Dad._

Jacob's dad was having a pretty rough time. It's not that money was the problem; his dad was loaded. The problem was his emotions. He didn't have much hope for himself. And it had all started a year-and-a-half ago.

* * *

Jacob woke up on the last day of winter break; Monday, January 3rd. He rolled over and looked at the clock.

_7:30 AM?! Come on, Jacob, you can do better than that,_ he scolded himself. _It's the last day of break, at least make it to 9 o'clock._

Jacob buried his face into his pillow in expectation of the sunrise. He didn't want anything to ruin this last bout of laziness he was allowed.

He tried to fall back asleep, but the effort was futile. There was an odd background noise making it over the fan that Jacob couldn't place. It was unpredictable, yet it had an odd rhythm to it. There were random low-pitched thumps, and a higher pitched whine that seemed to undulate up and down.

_Whatever it is, it's interfering with my laziness._

Jacob decided to get up and check it out. As soon as he opened the door, he was hit with the oddest (and in hindsight, saddest) scene he had ever seen outside of a movie theater.

His dad was banging on his bedroom door at random intervals, tears streaming down his face. He was begging for a new start, a new life, for forgiveness. He didn't even notice Jacob's existence. Silence emanated from the bedroom itself.

Jacob slowly backed into his room, unsure what to think. He quietly closed the door and fell down on the bed. His mind was blank. His body lost its strength. His heart lost its will to move.

His parent's bedroom door flew open and was slammed shut. Footsteps echoed away from Jacob's room. He heard the front door open, then get slammed shut. A car rumbled away from the now-stricken household.

Jacob's dad didn't explain anything until Tuesday afternoon. But it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what happened.

The evening of January 2nd was the last time Jacob ever saw his mom.

* * *

Jacob stared at the wall silently. The sun dipped behind a cloud, darkening the room a little.

Kiba saw Jacob stare straight ahead, but at no particular object. He wasn't sure what to think. Jacob rarely retreated into himself. He was always so outgoing usually.

Kiba scooted a little closer to Jacob.

Suddenly, a loud bark scared the two out of their wits. Jacob and Kiba swore they saw the other jump two feet. Two pairs of eyes darted around the room frantically.

Jacob's eyes locked on a white blob on top of Fox, the back of it moving back and forth. He begged for his eyes to focus just a little bit. Then, he realized that there was only one white blob in this entire house that can bark.

Akamaru had turned Fox's abdomen into his seat.

Kiba and Jacob burst out laughing. Neither one was sure if it was the sudden release of tension in the room, or just the sheer amount of cuteness slash heartwarming-ness of Akamaru warming up to Fox so quickly. But, the good spirits had come back again.

"Akamaru, how long have you been there?" Kiba asked between laughs.

"I guess he really is a ninja dog, isn't he?" Jacob replied, also between laughs.

"Just like I trained him," Kiba said, blowing his own whistle. They continued to watch Akamaru investigate Fox. He sniffed at his green armor. The dog moved towards the chest, moving his nose into Fox's scarf. Suddenly, he moved his left paw away from Fox's chest, as if committing a _faux pas_. He slinked his way over to the space between the back of the couch and Fox's head.

Kiba and Jacob had to rotate their torsos around to continue watching Akamaru.

Akamaru started sniffing Fox's head, starting at the nose and working his way down the muzzle. Then, the strangest thing happened. Akamaru started…whimpering. He was expressing…concern. Akamaru started nudging Fox right below the ear ever so slightly.

"Aww…Akamaru, are you worried about Fox there?" Kiba asked. Akamaru gave us a look that said, "Completely and utterly."

"Don't worry, he'll wake up soon," Jacob assured. _I hope, _he added in his head. Akamaru didn't seem too reassured, but he retreated back to Fox's lower chest and curled up in a tight, concerned ball. His eyes were fixed on Fox's head

The sight was so beautiful and heartwarming that Jacob thought he would cry manly tears for a moment.

"I really do hope he wakes up soon," Jacob repeated, this time towards Kiba.

"Yeah, so do I," Kiba said, turning around to face the piano again. "How do you think they're going to react?"

"I really don't know. I mean, I've had some thoughts about it," he said, shuddering when the shootout scenario went through his mind once again. "But…it's really all up in the air."

"You shuddered just there. Why did you shudder? That was weird."

_Damn, he's as observant as ever, _Jacob thought.

"Oh, it's just…my brain went all worst-case-scenario on me. It's nothing to worry about, trust me."

"Come on, tell me."

"Why?"

"Why not? If it's in your brain, that doesn't mean it's gonna happen…"

"Ok, fine, I guess it can't do any harm. I just don't really like to think about it."

"Well, why is that?"

"If you would let me speak, I would tell you."

"Sorry, sorry, sheesh."

"Ok," Jacob composed himself. "To put it simply, Fox and Wolf wake up at the same time. Now, because they're rivals, they freak out because their rival is in the same room as themselves. We try to explain what's going on, but they get into a shootout and we…we get caught in the crossfire."

Kiba stared at Jacob blankly.

"…And…it doesn't end well for us," Jacob finished. There was a moment of silence as Kiba tried to decide what to say.

"Dude, you know that's totally illogical, right?"

Jacob made an "okay" face.

"From personal experience," Kiba explained. "Confusion dominates when one wakes up from being unconscious. Not feelings of rivalry, or anger, or anything like that."

"It's crazy that you're only 14 and you have personal experience on this stuff."

"Hey, my birthday's in only a month."

Jacob smiled. "July 7th, right?"

"Exactly," he confirmed.

The two shared a goodhearted chuckle. Each took another drink of Amp. Jacob could almost feel his brain becoming more wired by the second. He liked that feeling.

"Well, this stuff's working," Jacob commented.

"Has it ever failed to?" Kiba pointed out.

"If it had, we wouldn't be drinking it anymore."

"Heh. Very true."

For whatever reason, Jacob's eyes traveled over to Wolf. He stared aimlessly at the unconscious lupine. Wolf's right ear twitched, but he did not stir. Out of nowhere, he was hit with a (probably) harmless yet devious idea. His face contorted into an evil grin. Kiba didn't waste any time noticing.

"Jacob, what are you thinking?" he asked.

"Nothing, it's just…haven't you ever wondered what Wolf's mechanical eye actually _does?_" Jacob replied.

"I assume that it's a mechanical eye, and that it helps his vision. End of story."

"I don't want to leave it at that. I mean, he's unconscious in our living room, we can find out for ourselves."

"Listen to my voice, Jacob. What about Star Fox makes you turn into Naruto on stimulants?"

"I'm just saying, we could find out quite easily."

"Or we could just wait till he wakes up and ask him ourselves."

"And what makes you think he'll tell us?"

Kiba raised his hand as if about to speak, then realized he was having a lot of trouble coming up with a counter-argument. Jacob seemed to know Star Fox better than anyone else, and he could be entirely right that Wolf would be secretive about that stuff.

Then again, Wolf quite possibly could rip the two humans in half if he discovered that they were messing with his stuff.

"I like my life more than I like messing with Wolf's stuff, Jacob."

"What do you mean?" Jacob asked, oblivious to Kiba's train of thought.

"Maybe you're right, maybe Wolf is secretive about his eye thing," Kiba explained, practically repeating his train of thought out loud. "And in that case, if he found out you've been messing with his stuff, especially that eye, you'd be fucked."

Jacob had considered that, but his plan was fully materialized in his head, and no doubting Thomas (or Kiba) was going to stop him.

"Don't worry; I have everything planned out…" Jacob reassured, getting up from the floor.

"I really don't think you should do this," Kiba cautioned.

But Jacob was already standing behind Wolf, fingers carefully approaching the gold bands running to the back of the lupine's head.

_Slowly…ever so slowly…_ Jacob coached himself as he gripped the bands with the very end of his fingertips. He took a good long look at Wolf to make sure he wasn't moving. Then he began to pull backwards.

Slowly, the cybernetic eye came off Wolf's head. It revealed his second eye. Two long white scars went horizontally from his eyelid to a point underneath his ear.

_Huh, wonder how that happened… _Jacob pondered for a moment.

Suddenly, Wolf's tail twitched and he took a loud, deep breath. Jacob froze in his tracks, not taking his eyes off Wolf for a moment. He only moved again once he was sure Wolf was not waking up in the middle of his escapade.

Luckily, he never did. Jacob succeeded in removing the mechanical eye from Wolf's face. Both Kiba and Jacob let out a long sigh.

"Alright…alright…" Jacob breathed out, returning to his spot next to Kiba.

"Dude, you had me freaked out when Wolf suddenly…uh…sighed? Breathed? Snorted? Hell, I don't know. You get the idea, right?" Kiba stammered out.

"Yeah, I agree with you there. I was about to shove it back on his head and run for the hills."

"Well, if you were crazy enough to get it, try it on and see what it does."

"I'm working on it…" Jacob said as a maneuvered the awkward headwear into position. He was a bit surprised when the mechanical eye auto-sized to fit his head, but it didn't mean any harm.

Jacob stared blankly into space. The cybernetic eye didn't seem very impressive at the moment, although, through his left eye, lines seemed a little sharper, and everything had a slight bluish tint.

"Well? How is it?" Kiba asked impatiently.

"It seems just like a mechanical eye, but I can't shake this feeling that it can do something more than improve vision…" Jacob replied. _And I'm not ready to give up on it yet._

Jacob let his left eyeball wander around, trying to find a unique characteristic with the mechanical eye.

_Fuck, what's your secret? What can you do that I don't know about?_ Jacob thought, directing it at the cybernetic eye.

His eyeball wandered to the top-left corner of its socket.

_Jackpot. _In said corner, there were four lines of small, robin's-egg-blue text. They read as follows:

_**Movement Speed: 0.00 sm/s**_

_**Range: 2.34768 sm**_

_**Temperature: 65° R**_

_**Status: Working**_

Jacob turned his head in several directions. The range stat cycled around as Jacob focused on different objects. He smiled.

"What?" Kiba asked, once again immediately reading Jacob's facial expression.

"It's giving me a few stats. Movement speed, range, and temperature. The only problem is that they're in units I don't recognize."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it's giving me range in something called an 'sm,' and temperature is in degrees R," Jacob explained.

"Huh, that's weird. They must use different units than us," Kiba remarked. There were a few moments of silence. Jacob got up and walked around, watching the movement speed statistic change. He did this for about a minute before Kiba spoke up again.

"So, is that it?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?"

"Well, it didn't exactly come with an instruction manual, Kiba."

"I know that, but I just thought it could do more."

_So did I, Kiba, _Jacob thought. He mulled over what more the piece of Cornerian technology could do. He thought about what Wolf might need in terms of fighting, or strategy, or flying his Wolfen. One idea hit him like an unconscious furry falling from the sky.

"Hey, Kiba, is your Amp can empty?" Jacob inquired.

"It's about to be," Kiba replied cleverly. He then proceeded to down the remaining contents of his can.

"Alright, could you do me a favor, then? Could you toss your can vertically upward? Like, high enough to almost hit the ceiling?"

"Any particular reason why?" Kiba asked back slowly.

"I have a hunch about this eye's abilities, and I need your help."

"Really? Well I'm at your service, then. Want me to do it now?"

"No, hang on a minute…" Jacob directed as he focused his eyesight on the can, especially his left eye. "Alright, in three, two, one…toss it!"

Kiba complied. The can flew upwards. Jacob followed it as closely as possible with his left eye. And, as it turns out, Jacob's hunch was correct. A small line of text appeared next to the can which gave its velocity. A thin green line extended away from the can, which Jacob assumed was the projected path of the can.

It fell back into Kiba's open palm.

"Dude…this is no ordinary cybernetic eye…" Jacob said in wonder.

"What exactly is an 'ordinary cybernetic eye'?" Kiba pointed out, trying to be a smart-ass. Jacob just shook his head.

"Like I was saying, this is no ordinary cybernetic eye; this thing is part targeting computer! When the can was in the air, this thing gave me the velocity AND a projected path!"

"No kidding?" Kiba asked, wonder in his face.

"Nope! Pretty cool, huh?"

"Dude, you gotta let me try!"

"Alright, here," Jacob said, removing the piece of Cornerian technology from his head and tossing it to Kiba. He caught it and put it on. His face immediately became one of surprise and enjoyment.

"Woah…now THIS is cool!" Kiba said, looking around the same way Jacob did. Kiba took in every single detail of the mechanical eye. He even tossed his can in the air to verify Jacob's statement.

"Told ya," Jacob offered.

"We should totally get on our bikes and see how fast we're going using this thing!" Kiba said, almost shouting.

Jacob laughed. "Yeah, except that would be extremely risky given that he could wake up at any moment."

"Maybe we can ask him to borrow it."

Jacob looked at him. His face said, _Yeah, riiiiight_

Kiba noticed his mistake. "You know, when he trusts us."

Jacob remained silent, with the same look on his face. Kiba gave up and returned to tossing his can around. That is, until the figurative light bulb appeared above his head.

"You know what'd be even cooler? If this thing had an infrared mode—" Kiba started excitedly, but then he cut himself off. He looked at Jacob's midsection with great focus. Then his head jerked towards Akamaru, still on top of Fox, and then to Fox himself.

"Huh. Well what do ya know. It does have an infrared mode," he spoke softly.

"Seriously?" Jacob asked, extremely skeptical.

"Yeah, here, see for yourself," he said, taking the eye off his head and tossing it back to Jacob. He put it back on his head.

_You liar, _Jacob thought, as he still saw the same slightly sharper lines, slight bluish tint, and four lines of status text.

"Kiba, you liar," Jacob said out loud. "This looks exactly the same as it did before I gave it to you."

"It must be voice-activated, then. Just try it."

Jacob mulled it over in his mind. He decided it couldn't do any harm to try.

"Infrared mode," Jacob sighed. Almost instantly, the color palette of the world around him changed from black through white to blue through red. Where Kiba's tan face, grey hoodie, and black pants were a moment ago, there was a conglomerate of green, yellow, and a smidge of red-orange. A similar mix of colors was perpendicular to the first; Jacob assumed that was Fox.

"Oh. You were right."

Jacob quickly got tired of the infrared mode. With no idea how to change it back to normal by voice command, he just took it off. Removing the mechanical eye revealed a look of smug satisfaction on Kiba's face. Jacob ignored it, choosing not to open up that can of worms.

Instead, he was overcome with worry. He half-expected to see Wolf towering over him, wondering what the hell he was doing with the cybernetic eye.

He turned in that direction, cringing.

Fortunately, Wolf was still as unconscious as ever.

Jacob sighed a little louder than he expected, but he walked back behind Wolf and put the eye back on his face. He once again returned to his spot next to Kiba.

"You know what'd be even cooler? If his eye had an X-ray mode…" Kiba started, but the last four words were barely audible. Kiba just stared at the floor.

"What are you going on about?" Jacob asked.

Kiba sighed. "It would just be cool if you could take X-rays with that eye."

Jacob had thought about that. "Yeah it would, and I can see where he could use it, but it doesn't seem…practical."

"Yeah," Kiba agreed.

_That was easy. A little TOO easy, _Jacob thought.

"Why did you bring that up, Kiba?"

"It's not important, just a silly suspicion," Kiba admitted, trying to throw Jacob off the trail. It didn't work.

"What kind of suspicion?"

"It's not important! Just drop it, okay," Kiba's voice rose a little. His stubborn nature was getting the best of him.

Unfortunately for Kiba, there were only two people in that room who might require an X-ray.

"Kiba," Jacob began pityingly, "if that suspicion has anything to do with Fox or Wolf, I want to, and need to know." Jacob's face expressed sympathy.

Kiba looked defeated. He looked sick of being defeated, but he was defeated.

"Well, remember when we found Fox, and he had blood leaking out of his mouth?"

"Yeah, I think it's matted in the fur now. Why?"

"From what I've seen, that usually means one of two things. One, he simply has some cuts in his mouth. Or two, he broke a rib or two. To be fully honest with you, I think it's the latter. Especially when I consider the way Akamaru suddenly stepped back while he was investigating Fox."

Jacob thought this over.

_He could be entirely right about the rib. Akamaru would be smart enough to discover this on his own. But…I really don't think Wolf's cybernetic eye has an X-ray mode. Seems too expensive. But what do I tell Kiba?_

"I'll keep that in mind, but the only way we'll know for sure is if Fox wakes up and complains about it."

_Good job, brain._

Kiba and Jacob mutually decided that that was the best course of action.

Many moments of silence occurred as Jacob finished his Amp. Footsteps came from outside, and the doorbell rang. Kiba was about to get up and answer it when Jacob stopped him.

"No dude, it's probably a news crew. They don't need to know that Fox and Wolf are real. Not yet," Jacob cautioned. Kiba saw the reason in this and sat back down.

Thankfully, they weren't persistent. Footsteps trailed off the porch.

They sat in silence for a little while. Kiba quickly got bored.

"So, what do we do now? Cause these furries are taking forever to wake up," Kiba complained.

_No shit, _Jacob thought.

"We could pull out our laptops," he suggested.

Kiba thought for a moment.

"M'kay."

The two of them stood up and headed back towards their room. Jacob easily found his laptop on the floor next to his bed, along with the charger and cord, while Kiba had to dig through his cabinet to find his. Jacob stole a glance at the clock.

_8:30!? Geez, how the hell did all that take only an hour-fifteen?_

Jacob stowed his laptop under his arm as he left the room.

_Ah hell, some AVA will kill some time._

He made it back to the living room and set his laptop on the floor, next to the end of the couch where Fox's head was. He ran the charger cord to an outlet on the wall behind the couch. The laptop sprang to life. Jacob laid on his stomach as he waited for it to boot up.

Kiba entered the living room at that time. He chose to set his laptop on his lap and rest his back against the couch bottom. Two red fangs were clearly visible on the back of his laptop.

_Kiba's sense of decoration_, Jacob's brain thought, being snarky. _Not sure if that means he's conceited, or he's just being true to his heritage. Probably both._

Jacob typed in his password at the login screen. He waited for Windows 7 to do its thing. Soon enough, his Star Fox background was staring back at him.

_Huh, maybe I should change that._

…

_Nah, they'll find out soon enough anyway. THAT'LL be fun._

Jacob double-clicked the Alliance of Valiant Arms icon on his desktop. Aeria Ignite started on its own and logged him in automatically. Over the internet, he was known as CloudFox.

The game experienced a textbook startup. He double-clicked on "PvP Channel 1." He was surprised to find one of his clanmates online.

_Huh, that's weird. Lolee never gets on this early._

Apparently, the guy whose screen name was "lol33pop" was wondering the same thing, because a line of pink text appeared at the bottom of the chat box, which occupied the bottom fourth of the screen.

_lol33pop: Lolhai, what are you doing on?_

Soon afterwards, another line followed it.

_lol33pop: I thought you had dat bike ride?_

Another line of text indicated Kiba had come on the same game. His screen name was "AkamaruKiba."

_CloudFox: Yeah but we had to cancel._

_AkamaruKiba: and you'll never guess why._

_lol33pop: rain?_

_CloudFox: no_

_AkamaruKiba: nope_

_lol33pop: flat tires?_

_AkamaruKiba: nope_

_CloudFox: i wasn't being sarcastic, youll literally never guess why._

_lol33pop: too tired?_

_lol33pop: oh, uhhh…_

_lol33pop: you guise live in nebraska right?_

_CloudFox: yeah, why?_

_AkamaruKiba: yeah._

_lol33pop: uhhh_

_lol33pop: arwing in your lawn?_

Jacob and Kiba looked at each other, wide-eyed. Jacob's hands pitter-pattered furiously on their keyboards.

_CloudFox: how the fk did you know?_

_lol33pop: its…its all over the news, mate._

_lol33pop: have you turned on your tv this morning?_

Kiba face-palmed.

_AkamaruKiba: we'll brb…_

Jacob retrieved the remote from the small glass table next to Wolf's recliner. He switched the TV on. It was still on Cartoon Network.

_Heh, Adventure Time. I love that show. No time for that now, though, sadly, _Jacob thought. He hit the three key twice to bring the TV to CNN. The screen immediately changed to an aerial view of their neighborhood, smashed Arwing sitting center stage. The headline read, "Unknown Aircraft Crash in Omaha."

The people on the screen talked, but Jacob didn't listen. He didn't want to be told what he already knew. Jacob just turned it off.

"How could we not realize this was a newsworthy event?" Jacob wondered aloud.

"I dunno, but I think we were busy rescuing furries, drinking Amp, and messing with Wolf's eye-thingy," Kiba said as if he was Capitan Obvious.

"Ugh. If we were old enough, I'd say we need a stiff drink," Jacob complained. "Let's just go back to the game."

Jacob laid back down on his stomach in front of his laptop. He double-clicked on a room named "E-boat allday." Soon, Kiba and lol33pop were there with him. The air was filled with simulated gunshots, alarm klaxons, shouts of "Fuck!" and gut-busting laughter. Yeah, Jacob and Kiba really got into their game.

They played for God-knows how long. Each one had their moments of epic win, epic failure, epic herp-derp, epic rage, and epic fun.

_AVA is always a good time. It doesn't matter how you do, _Jacob remarked.

Their fourth game would be cut short, however. During one of the quieter moments of the game, Jacob heard a slight rustling above his head. He immediately killed his volume, but Kiba was oblivious to the barely audible noise that seemed to be emanating from Fox.

"Kiba, kill your volume!" Jacob commanded in a hushed tone. Kiba looked at him with a _WTF? _expression. Jacob pointed upwards.

Kiba saw Fox's head and upper body twitch. Not just his ears twitched anymore, but his entire upper body was twitching. He seemed to be clutching at his stomach, too.

Seeing that spectacle, Kiba complied with Jacob's request.

Akamaru, suddenly disturbed from his slumber, gave a loud bark and jumped down in surprise.

_Oh…God…_ Jacob thought as he suddenly realized what Fox was about to do.

"Kiba…go get that white plastic bowl from the kitchen," Jacob said as he slowly rose to his feet.

"What? Wh-?"

"Now!"

* * *

**A/N: Not bad, huh? It's probably obvious what Fox is about to do, but it was the best place I could come up with for a cliffy.**

**Oh yeah, and in case I didn't mention this in the first chapter cause I didn't want to sound desperate: Reviews are appreciated. So, yeah. I'll just leave you to that. *motions towards review box.***

**Once again, happy reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: This wound up going a lot quicker than I expected. I think that's because this is the first chapter my mind created, and then I worked backwards. I guess that's how this idea formed, but you know what? I'm rambling again, so just enjoy the new chapter!**

* * *

Kiba raced into the kitchen and tore open the cupboard. He immediately found what he was looking for, albeit in the middle of a stack of bowls. The white one was right in the middle, halfway between the smallest bowl, which was yellow, and the biggest bowl, which was blue.

_I don't know what he needs it for, but when he talks like that, I know to trust him. He's the closest thing to a teammate I've found in this strange world,_ he thought.

Soon enough, the white bowl was wrenched free of its companions.

"Hurry, hurry, hurry!" Jacob shouted from the other room. Fox was rolling towards Jacob, having used his arms to find some empty space in which to…well…you'll see.

Kiba rushed from the kitchen. Jacob heard his loud, slightly uncoordinated footsteps pounding on the wood floor. Akamaru, startled by all the sudden developments, kept his distance from the scene by standing on the piano bench.

Jacob was fully on his feet now, squatting slightly. He knew Fox probably couldn't hear him, and positively wouldn't be able to care or act on Jacob's advice, but he shouted out some anyway.

"Come on man! Hold it in a little longer! Kiba!" he exclaimed as the ninja rounded the corner. "Toss it! Toss it!" He did. The bowl started on its parabolic path.

"Come on, Fox!"—Fox's cheeks began to swell—"Three more seconds!"—the bowl was at the top of its flight path—Fox's teeth were the only thing holding it back—"Hang on!"—the bowl was just short of Jacob's hands—and the floodgates were opened.

Yellow-brown vomit was ejected from the injured vulpine only a second before the bowl could be moved into position…but the damage was done. Some of it had found a home outside Fox's stomach, and that home…was Jacob's ankles and feet.

The bowl efficiently caught the rest of it, but the feeling of warm vomit soaking through socks was something Jacob would never forget.

The third person view was something Kiba would never forget, either. All he could do was stand and watch as Fox violently ejected the contents of his stomach, well, _everywhere._ The way his tail had stiffened, how his ears had folded back, the way his fur flattened itself…Kiba would never be able to erase that image.

Fox moaned and rolled all the way over, facing the back of the couch in a fetal position.

Jacob stared straight ahead at the blinds, wanting to move his legs, but finding himself unable to. His eyes squinted in disgust and anger. He slowly leaned over and placed the bowl on the small table behind Fox's head.

_Thank God I shoved my laptop away…_ Jacob thought.

Around this time, Kiba realized that vomiting after unconsciousness was quite possible, and that he had done it himself once or twice. In the second display of becoming conscious of something a little too late, Kiba said this:

"Oh yeah…I forgot that could happen…sorry about that," Kiba said with a slight nervous grin. Jacob was too disgusted to get very angry at his ninja buddy.

"Whatever…I'm gonna go wash this shit off my feet. Just get the carpet cleaner or something," he said, walking on his heels towards the bathroom as to not spread the puke all over the place. There was a tone in his voice that Kiba couldn't recognize at first.

But when he did, his heart sank. That tone was disappointment.

_Fuck, why am I being such a bad teammate today?! Kiba scolded himself. What happened to the fun-loving yet competent Kiba?_

He looked at Fox's barely moving form. He was silent, but Kiba didn't doubt that he was awake. At this point, it looked more like Fox was, more or less, refusing to get up.

Akamaru, sensing hurt from his master, jumped off the piano bench and nuzzled against Kiba's leg, being explicitly carefully to avoid the vomit on the carpet. Kiba looked down and gave a weak smile. He gave Akamaru a scritch behind the ears.

_At least you're around to cheer me up._

The noise of bath water echoed out of the open bathroom door. Jacob hadn't bothered with it; only his feet needed washing.

Kiba sighed. He headed for the kitchen, Akamaru happily trailing behind him, hoping that the carpet cleaner would be found there. He checked all the overhead cabinets, to no avail. Next he checked the ground level cabinets. He thought he had found the jackpot in the cabinet underneath the sink, but that turned out to only be a bottle of drain cleaner. The Lazy Susan was another option, but this too was devoid of carpet cleaner.

_Gah, where the hell could it be? _Kiba thought to himself. Hopefully, Jacob wouldn't be angry enough to not answer his question.

"Jacob, where exactly IS the carpet cleaner?" he yelled down the hallway.

"I don't know! Did you check on top of the fridge in the basement?" came the reply.

_Dafuq? _"Why the hell would it be on top of a refrigerator in the basement?"

"It's the last place I remember seeing it, Kiba. I'm just telling you what I know."

"Would you shut up, please? This headache is killing me!" a third voice exclaimed. However, to Jacob, it sounded similar to Kiba's. Similar enough that he assumed Kiba's voice just cracked a little.

"What was that for, Kiba?!" Jacob yelled, feet still in the water.

"What are you talking about, I didn't say anything!" Kiba yelled, at that point descending the stairs next to the dining room.

"He didn't, I did, now please shut UP!" the third voice exclaimed again, a little more exasperated than before.

Kiba smiled with grim satisfaction that Jacob had been proven wrong for once. He continued his trek through the basement.

Meanwhile, Jacob was wrapping up his foot-washing adventure. The water had turned a sickly shade of yellow, But at least my feet are clean again. Hopefully Kiba won't hold this over my head like he has with some of my other...embarrassments.

Thinking about this, he had totally forgotten about the third voice that had cut the shouting match between Kiba and him short.

_Who could it be? The only people in this house are us and the furries, but they couldn't possibly be..._Kiba's words about the vomit ran through his head..._My god, Fox!_

Hurriedly, he pulled his feet out of the fermenting vomit water and wrapped them in a towel. He pulled the drain plug for the bathtub and rubbed the water off of his feet in one clumsy motion. He wiped his hands really quickly, threw the towel on top of the toilet (he would deal with it later) and rushed out of the bathroom, not bothering with turning off the light. He ran out to the living room.

Jacob found Wolf still unconscious in his chair. Fox, on the other hand, was curled up on the couch, almost exactly as he left him. His tail hung limply over the edge of the couch. His furry hands (paws?) had moved, though. Both were covering his ears with the fingers, and the thumbs were holding his eyes closed. He seemed to be practically burying his muzzle in the space between the cushion and couch frame, as if he wanted to become a part of the couch.

Jacob slowly approached the vulpine. He didn't see any claws sticking out of the fingers like he did with Wolf, but Jacob wondered if that could change in an instant.

He stood in front of the couch. Whether or not Fox noticed his presence, Jacob wasn't sure.

Jacob had no idea how to even begin communicating with the Lylatian. He knew well enough that he spoke English; that was made clear through his little outbursts earlier. But how on Earth was he supposed to start a conversation?

Fox shifted around a little bit.

_What do I tell him? Do I let him find out his situation more or less on his own, or do I just explain everything now and hope things make sense? Would he even care right now? He must have one terrible headache if he's acting this way...ugh, I don't know how to start._

Jacob's though train rumbled forward. His hand grasped the back of his neck, rubbing it nervously. Wolf gave another one of his snort/loud breath noises.

Jacob did notice one pattern in his head, though. Everything seemed to come back to Fox's headache. If he never gets relief from it, Jacob reasoned, then how can Jacob expect him to do anything?

So, the plan was set. Jacob would start with fixing his headache, and cross every other bridge when he came to it.

After a moment of mustering up some courage, Jacob spoke up with a rather even tone, given the circumstances.

"You...you all right, man?"

"What do you think, dumbass?" Fox snapped back, his splitting headache causing him to be extremely short-tempered. His eyes remained closed.

Jacob could have chosen from over fifty snarky replies to this question, but he refused to let that side of him take control. This wasn't the time.

Instead, he busied his mind with what kind of pain medicine could be fed to the vulpine. He understood that he couldn't use brand names, the amount of fanfiction he read confirmed this notion. The chances that both planets had a pain medication named Tylenol were just too slim. Alternatively, he used the only ingredient name he could remember.

"Well, I can offer you some water and ibuprofen. If you want it."

"Please," he muttered.

_Alright, that's one mystery solved, _Jacob thought as he turned around. The instant he did, he heard the familiar sound of footsteps coming up the stairs. Kiba and Jacob's eyes met in the kitchen.

"Found it," Kiba said proudly, holding up the red _Resolve_ bottle as if it was a triumphant kill. Akamaru barked happily, confirming his master's success. Jacob opened up the cupboard.

"What are you up to?" Kiba asked innocently, being as observant as ever.

"Fox needs some pain meds. And probably a little something to wash out the vomit taste," Jacob said, grabbing a cup. He held it under the faucet and let the cold tap water fill it up.

"Oh. Well, I'm gonna go clean up the mess then," the dog-boy announced. He was about to turn and leave when Jacob felt he needed to mention something.

"One thing, Kiba. I wouldn't try talking to Fox," he warned quietly. "His headache is turning him into a real bitch. Chances are all you'll get is an insult."

"Duly noted." Kiba grabbed a couple paper towels and exited the kitchen.

Now that the glass was full, he shut off the tap and grabbed the bottle of medicine out of an adjacent cupboard.

_1? 2? 1? Eh, better go two, Jacob thought, measuring out the pills in his hand. Even if it is a little too much, he needs it._

Placing the bottle back, he grabbed the glass of water of the tiled countertop and went back to the living room. Kiba was bent over the vomit stain, waiting for the carpet cleaner to do its job. Fox was still curled up, hands on his head in pain. Wolf still lolled back in the recliner.

Jacob walked over and tapped Fox on the shoulder. He didn't budge.

_Ass._ "Dude, do you want your pain meds or not?" Jacob demanded, his nerves beginning to wear thin.

Fox responded by grasping at the air in a futile search for the glass, keeping his eyes closed. Jacob sighed and moved the glass into his open palm. His fingers felt the contour of the glass. Realizing that it was indeed the water, he simply held his other palm open, waiting for the pills to drop into it.

_Are you fucking kidding me?_ Jacob's face said as he dropped the pills into the currently lazy vulpine's hand/paw (Jacob wasn't sure what to call it yet).

Raising his head just slightly, he dropped the rust-colored pills into his mouth. He opened his eyes just a smidge so he could aim the glass, and nearly drained it in one swig. He held the glass back in the air, his eyes shut tight once more. Jacob took it and sat it next to the vomit bowl, wondering if he should mix the two to get back at Fox for his laziness.

Kiba found the spectacle highly amusing. Jacob wasn't easy to anger, but he was very liable to explode if you did. Fox was really trying Jacob's patience, he could tell just by his face. And Kiba enjoyed every minute of it, but was very careful not to laugh, lest he incur Jacob's wrath instead.

Jacob sighed. "I'm going back to my game," he said bitterly.

He moved back over towards his laptop, the top bent over pretty far from his haphazard shoving. He found that he had been kicked from the room he was in.

_Probably from being afk. Should've known. Just one more thing to piss me off this morning._

He clicked out of the kicked message and returned to the PVP 1 lobby. He found that lol33pop had asked about him and Kiba's whereabouts several times before giving up and going somewhere else.

_Kiba probably got kicked too, then. That's a little consolation. Well, that and he's stuck with the carpet cleaning_.

Jacob looked up at Kiba. He was still waiting for the foam to finish its work. He looked back down and chose an Annihilation room, since he probably didn't have time for any round-based gameplay.

_Plus, a little mindless deathmatch is just what the doctor ordered._

The sound of Kiba scrubbing the carpet echoed through the room as Jacob waited for his game to load.

"Shit, vomit stains are tough to get out," he said to himself, spraying more carpet cleaner on the yellow stain.

Jacob smiled behind his laptop.

He enjoyed his team deathmatch game for about 5 minutes, but then a disgusting yet familiar smell entered his nostrils.

_Ugh, why does it smell like vomit again?_ he

Jacob was about to just pack up and go play somewhere else when he realized that there was an easy solution to his problem. All he had to do was empty out the white plastic bowl that was still full of Fox puke. In all the confusion of Fox's awakening, Jacob had forgotten about the bowl entirely.

_Do I really want to keep playing AVA?...no, I don't…_ Jacob decided. He closed out of the game and shut his laptop, then went after the puke bowl. The smell was incredibly rancid.

_God, what has he been eating?!_

Jacob held the bowl at arm's length to keep the smell as far away as possible. He then fast-walked towards the bathroom. On his way, he heard Kiba's frustrated voice.

"Dammit! Get out of the carpet!" it said in a hushed tone.

Jacob smiled to himself as he closed the bathroom door behind him. He promptly dumped the contents of the bowl into the open toilet, holding his nose closed with one hand. Then, he had to wash out the bowl in the bathroom sink, and dump those contents into the toilet as well. When all was said and dumped, he flushed the toilet, eliminating the last trace of Lylatian vomit from the household.

He was about to rejoin his friend-turned-maid, but unfortunately, nature dialed Jacob's number.

_Whatever, just make it quick,_ Jacob told his bowels as he dropped his pants.

Meanwhile, back in the living room, Kiba was finally having some luck with the carpet cleaning. The stain was finally starting to wash out, and so was the smell.

Fox was having a little luck, too. His headache was beginning to wane, and his brain was able to take visual input again without causing him splitting pain above his eyes. He looked straight ahead.

There wasn't much to see; just a forest-green couch back, which kind of matched his combat armor. His head rested on a tan pillow. He could still taste a little blood in his mouth. Luckily, his chest didn't hurt, and that was a good sign.

The vulpine brought his hands down off of his ears. He immediately heard a faint swishing noise, like a sponge on carpet.

_I wonder where the hell I am…_ Fox thought. _The last thing I remember is being thrown though that blue portal thing by a female robot thingy…_

Fox rolled over slowly, careful not to further damage any part of him that might be damaged. Sadly, Fox didn't realize he shouldn't have moved until he was already facing the living room. Directly in his line of sight was his sworn rival, the lupine with the bad eye, the leader of Star Wolf, Wolf O'Donnell.

Every muscle fiber in his being tensed up at once. His arm instinctively felt for the handle of his blaster. He was about to pull it out when his eyes focused properly and he saw that Wolf was unconscious.

However, questions still streamed through the stranded vulpine's mind.

_Why the hell is he here? Do these people not know about our rivalry? Where the hell are they, anyway? My body didn't just crawl out of my Arwing on its own._

Fox's eyes scrolled down from his knocked out rival onto a tuft of messy brown hair. Oddly enough, Fox noticed, there weren't any ears sticking out.

_Ok, now I'm even more confused. Who, or what, is this creature?_

As if on cue, the creature looked up, and eye contact was established between the Cornerian and the Earthling.

Fox couldn't believe what he was seeing. The creature had no fur! Anywhere! Just the hair and then…skin! He also had two fang-shaped tattoos on his face, and a bulge between and below the eyes that Fox assumed was a nose of some sort. He couldn't place the location of the ears, though. It baffled him. Fox wanted to break eye contact, but found that it was impossible. He hoped not to offend the creature, but at the same time, wanted to see what would happen.

_Great, though. Who knows how far I must be from the Lylat system? _Fox realized. Nothing in Lylat looked like the creature in front of his face. All he could tell was that they had a distinct resemblance to apes.

From Kiba's perspective, things got awkward really fast. He heard the rustling coming from the couch, finished up the carpet cleaning, and looked up to find a pair of strikingly green eyes staring right at him. They looked incredibly bewildered at the sight of the ninja.

_Of course this happens while Jacob isn't around. He knows what he's doing with these furries. I don't. What's taking him so long, anyway? What's so hard about emptying out a vomit bowl?_

"Jacob!" Kiba yelled down the hallway. "Your services are required!"

Jacob, unfortunately, was having the bowel movement of his life. This author does not want to go into details, but let's just say his rectum was burning like the fires of Hell.

"To put it nicely, Kiba," Jacob yelled back, fighting back tears and putting in plenty of effort just to keep an even tone. "Nature called, and I can't hang up!"

_I wonder what I did to piss off Nature so much,_ Jacob reflected.

Kiba sighed, rubbing his temples in annoyance.

_No sense staying silent, then,_ Kiba decided.

"Hi," Kiba said, trying to break the ice.

Fox responded with "Hi…" and a weak wave.

"…Feeling better, I assume?" Kiba observed.

"Yeah…" In fact, the first sight of the human had made Fox forget he ever had a headache.

_I wonder how much he knows,_ Fox thought, his mind entering commando mode. _And what encouraged him to save me, even though I highly doubt he's ever seen a Lylatian before?_

Fox pondered this for a while, wanting to ask about it, but unsure on how to phrase the question. His train of thought was interrupted, however, by the unusual creature sitting on the floor in front of him.

"So...we noticed you had some blood leaking out of your mouth...just gonna check...any chest pain?" Kiba asked in a broken heap of words. The awkward level in the room increased once more.

_Similar physiology: probable. Obviously wondering if I have a broken rib or something,_ Fox noted. Luckily for the both of them, the vulpine's chest felt normal.

"No, it feels fine," Fox answered truthfully. His mouth, however, did feel a little ripped up. Fox assumed it was his fangs that caused the cuts. Just another drawback of having them.

Behind the awkward human and Lylatian chatter, Akamaru was busy deciding if Fox had calmed down enough for him to return. He noticed his master was making conversation with the fellow furry creature, and Akamaru decided that that was good enough for him.

Jumping off the piano bench, Akamaru chose to make his second surprise appearance during the morning of June 8th.

When the smaller white creature jumped onto the vulpine's chest, it nearly scared him half to death. He uttered a short, soft, yet distinct scream. Soon though, Fox's brain refocused, and he realized that the new creature meant no harm. Its tail was wagging, and his face looked genuinely happy.

The problem lied within the fact that Akamaru was a dog, and therefore he looked very familiar to Fox. The human chuckled, but Fox couldn't discern at what.

_This thing looks like a dog, but a shrunken one! And it uses all four of its limbs to walk for some reason instead of two. Damn, this place is confusing!_ he

"Heh, I see Akamaru likes you," Kiba said.

_"I see Aka-whatever likes you"? What, can he not speak for himself? _Fox's inner query was answered when Akamaru gave a happy yet resounding bark. Fox's ears folded back at the sudden volume increase.

_Geez! Dogs only do that on Corneria when they're really, REALLY pissed._ But the wagging tail and happy behavior suggest otherwise.

Akamaru stood on Fox's thighs expectantly.

_Like I said, this place is confusing! _Fox mused.

"Don't be shy, man, he wants you to pet him," Kiba instructed. Unbeknownst to Kiba, though, he just set off a bomb inside of Fox's head. His expression turned from confused to severe.

_Did he seriously just ask me to pet the dog-creature? What am I, a three-year-old to him?_

"Excuse me?" Fox said flatly. Now it was Kiba and Akamaru's turn to be confused. Fox was obviously offended, but for the life of him, Kiba couldn't figure out why. Akamaru was puzzled, too. His tail had ceased wagging, and his head was cocked sideways.

"Hello? You still there?" Kiba asked, his jagged nature getting the better of him. He couldn't figure out why Fox had turned so angry, but he wasn't gonna back down if Fox's temper flared. He was planning to show the vulpine that he wasn't to be messed with. Kiba had missed that opportunity when he met Jacob, but that wasn't going to happen again.

Fox was unfazed by Kiba's sudden change of temper. In fact, it reminded him of a very specific avian friend of his. _And I've learned exactly how to deal with people like Falco. _

If Fox could've grinned without giving up his position, he would have. The vulpine held his severe gaze.

"You gonna tell me what's up, or are you just gonna stare at me until one of us drops dead?" Kiba said arrogantly.

_Sounds like something straight out of Falco's playbook. _Fox was hit with a twinge of sadness when he remembered how far he was from Falco, but there was no time for missing people right now.

Fox decided to counter Kiba's arrogance with truth. If Kiba was anything like Falco, playing the arrogance game would only give the creature the upper hand.

"Where I come from, petting is reserved for a sign of love between parent and kit, or as a measure of comfort within family members or a group of close friends during exceedingly tough times. Not as some kind of trivial greeting," Fox explained through gritted teeth, showing the furless creature that he still meant business.

Kiba was taken aback. Not even Jacob could defuse him that quickly.

_Wow. It's like he's had practice with this…Now what do I do?_

"...Oh. That makes sense, I guess..." Kiba admitted, defeated once more. He needed to change his tactics, but that's a train of thought for another time. He looked away, unsure how to proceed.

Kiba did know there was a difference between the dogs on Earth and whatever might be on Corneria. It had something to do with the fact that dogs on Earth don't really have consciousness. Like, they can't think about their own existence, think ahead, perform anything more than the most basic reason, and so on. Kiba couldn't seem to find a way to explain this in a simple manner. There was a word he wanted to use, but he couldn't remember exactly what it was.

_I think it starts with an "s", or maybe a "c", one of the two, but which one. Damn it, what's the word I'm looking for?_

Akamaru looked at Fox with a textbook begging face for a little while longer, but soon after realized that he wasn't getting anything from the fellow furry creature. He just went back to curling up on Fox's abdomen.

Strangely enough to Kiba, Fox didn't seem to mind Akamaru sitting on his lap. The vulpine appeared to be just hanging out at this point, laying on his back, staring up at the ceiling. One arm was simply hanging over the front of the couch; the other was not visible, but was assumed to be against Fox's side.

His face changed to one of discomfort, then he took off the grey communication device on his head and set it on the floor.

The two of them sat in somewhat awkward silence. Kiba was unable to come up with a way to convince Fox that petting Akamaru was acceptable, while Fox couldn't figure out how to move the "conversation" forward.

Eventually, Jacob stumbled out of the bathroom and down the hallway, causing Kiba and Fox to snap out of their heads. He didn't make it far into the living room, and he fell flat on his face.

The reason being that Jacob's ass still felt like it was on fire.

"God, I wish it was winter," Jacob complained, still face-down. "That way, I could go outside and stick my ass in the snow. Just for a little relief..."

Kiba shoved his chin into his chest, trying to prevent himself from laughing too hard. Fox was even more confused.

"That bad, huh?" Kiba remarked.

"That bad," Jacob responded. His rear writhed around in a slow circle.

_That's a little melodramatic, _Kiba thought. _But that's certainly the Jacob I know. I wonder if he even realizes that Fox isn't frozen with pain anymore?_

Kiba thought about this for a moment, then he came to a realization of his own.

_Even if he did, would he care?_

Fox finally got fed up with being left in the dark. There was so much he didn't know, and he decided to ask every question in his head, courtesy be damned. Starting with the most pertinent one.

"What the fuck is wrong with him?" he blurted out, pointing at the other creature recovering from his ass pain.

"I'm no doctor, but I'd say he just went through the equivalent of shitting bricks," Kiba replied, being just as blunt as Fox.

Fox was about to speak up again, but Jacob, overhearing the chatter, beat him to it.

"Nope, the opposite of bricks. It was like a freaking fire hose back there," Jacob countered, using the most euphemistic term he could come up with. Fox and Kiba's faces contorted into ones of complete disgust.

"Is he always that crude?" Fox asked to Kiba.

"When he wants to be. You're never gonna meet another guy like him, though. I can guarantee that."

"Yeah, I can see that..."

Meanwhile, Jacob had risen to his hands and knees, confident that his ass pain was probably done with. He looked up and noticed that Fox was no longer curled up in a tight ball, rather he was propping himself up on his elbows. Akamaru was back in his spot on Fox's abdomen. Jacob smiled.

"Feeling better, I see," he commented.

"Yup..." Fox was unsure how to proceed with the second creature. He lacked the red face marks and the beastly eyes. Instead, he had more angular features, blue-green eyes, similar messy brown hair, except not as thick, and was taller and leaner. The second one still carried an air of strength and confidence around him; he was practically broadcasting this message: _Hey, I can be your best friend, or I can be one cast-iron bitch. Your choice._

Fox also sensed the fact that the second one was easy to talk to, yet he could turn almost anything into a joke if he wanted to. He would have to word his questions carefully.

_I guess that psychology class in high school paid off after all... _Fox thought.

"Alright, I need to get some information, and I need to get it now. Don't play games, because I have my blaster and I'm not afraid to use it," Fox warned, suddenly turning serious. This obvious change in temperament did not go unnoticed to the humans. And both Jacob and Kiba knew that being on the wrong end of a Lylatian blaster was a very bad thing.

"Don't worry, Fox, there's no need for that. We're here to help," Jacob said, realizing he let the vulpine's name slip just a little too late. He scooted closer to the couch, resting on his knees.

"Good, then we have no prob-wait. How did you know my name?" Fox wanted to know.

_Shitcakes, why did I say that?_ Jacob was suddenly in a pickle. He could just come out and say he's featured in a video game here, but that would most certainly raise more questions than it answered.

_An added benefit to that: my brains might be splattered on the wall. _

A small bead of sweat emerged from the back of Jacob's neck. All the Amp in his system made his brain race at lightning speed. Luckily, one of the race participants was Kiba's comment on how the Star Fox characters have obvious names.

"Oh, I didn't, that was...more of an observation," Jacob finally said, proud of himself. He would have to remember to thank Kiba later.

"Oh, okay...wait. What benchmark do YOU have for calling me a fox?" he shot back.

_Double shitcakes. _Fox had put him in another pickle. This time, though, Akamaru was his saving grace. Jacob remembered that furry creation was simple. All humans had done was take an animal's head, stuck it on a human body, and covered the body with fur. Add one tail, mix in human consciousness, add a dash of animal instinct, and you've got one piping hot furry. Serves 6.

"Well, you see the furry white creature using your lap as a bed?" Jacob began to explain.

"I don't see where this is going, but yeah."

"That's what we call a dog. Now I don't know what kind of fellow creatures you have where you come from, but I'm assuming you might have similar-faced friends, just based on the two of you that we found," Jacob said, feigning complete ignorance of the Star Fox universe at this point.

"Of course we do. One of my closest friends is a dog"-Fox caught himself-"well, what we call a dog." _I wonder how Bill's doing. I wonder if he even knows I'm gone yet..._Fox added in his mind.

"Awesome, that simplifies things. Well...a similar line of logic follows. There are creatures here that we call 'red foxes,' and, at least headwise, you and a red fox look exactly alike. Hence, the observation." Jacob loved saying the word "hence".

Fox still looked incredibly skeptical. Jacob really didn't feel like elaborating much further, so he tried a cop-out.

"Look, I can prove it to you later if you like, but right now, just take my word for it. You can trust me. Truthfully, I'm afraid that if I do another bad deed, Nature will set my ass alight again." The memory of the pain made Jacob shudder.

Fox lightened up a little. He was right about the second one. He _could _turn anything into a joke, almost effortlessly it seemed. He let a smile escape his usually stoic expression.

"Who would I be to argue with that kind of pain?" Fox said, playing along.

"I know, right?" Jacob was glad to see this new development. Maybe it wouldn't be so hard to explain everything. When it came to the video game thing, Jacob was still unsure how to even bring that up. Hopefully, Fox would stay in a good mood, and it wouldn't be s bad.

_I can always hope. _

"Listen," Jacob continued. "We did _not_ get off on the right foot. It's time for a proper introduction."

"I couldn't agree more," Fox said, sitting up on the couch

"My name's Jacob Trentski, and my tattooed friend here is Kiba Inuzuka."

"Fox. Fox McCloud." Human and Cornerian hands shook for the first time in history.

"Welcome to Earth, dude."

* * *

**A/N: There you go! Fox is awake now, and after violently ejecting his stomach contents, seems calm. Will his temperament change after getting some disappointing information? We'll see!**

**Also, I'm going to start setting goals for myself on when each chapter should be done, and I will share them with you. So if I'm late, please yell at me. Don't forget to review, either, I think that's important.**

**Enjoy your wait!**

**Chapter 4 projected date: October 13th**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Good news, everyone! Chapter 4 is here early. Yay! By less than 12 hours! Yay! Anyway, this is a special release, because I have also posted a one-shot that provides a little backstory on Kiba's sudden appearance on Earth in the Naruto section. It be called _How to Befriend an Anime Character._ So, if you're curious, give it a read. Be warned, though, it kind of came out of my archives. Take that however you want. Anyway, enjoy the latest chapter, plz kthxbai.**

* * *

"Earth, huh?" the vulpine muttered as he searched his brain. "Never heard of it."

"What?" Kiba said, feigning surprise. "But it's simply all the rage here!"

Jacob laughed at this. Fox just face-palmed, but the humans saw the smile on his muzzle. It was like a friend had just told a bad joke, but he couldn't prevent himself from smiling anyways.

"Very funny," he said sarcastically, the straight face coming back at record speed.

"Ah, that's just as well, though. Even if you guys knew about our planet's existence, you'd probably call it something different anyways," Jacob pointed out, taking the rational route.

Two hours earlier, Jacob and Kiba had pulled two Lylatians from the wreckage of an Arwing. One of them, Fox McCloud, was now awake and having a conversation with the humans. The other, Wolf O'Donnell, was still unconscious in a recliner.

"Whatever. I can probably find my way back home through my ship's onboard computer," Fox said. Jacob and Kiba exchanged a look of regret and pity.

_The poor, deluded fox. I'm gonna feel bad about breaking the news to him that he's stranded, _Jacob thought.

"Right…" he said with a downward inflection. Fox must not have noticed, because he moved right on to another question.

"Do you guys have anything to drink? My mouth stilltastes of vomit with a hint of blood."

"Sure. Anything in particular you want, or—" Jacob offered, but was interrupted.

"Not really, just please bring it fast. This taste sucks."

Kiba got a mischievous look in his eyes.

_If Fox is going to be stranded here, then the least we can do is share our favorite addiction—I mean drink, _was the dog-boy's train of thought.

"Hey, Jacob," Kiba said with a rather creepy smile. "Wanna give him an Amp?"

Jacob soon got the same mischievous look. What better way to greet their new furry buddy than to give him a taste of true earthen energy?

"That's an excellent idea, old chap," Jacob said with a British accent for reasons even Jacob couldn't deduce. "Fox, wait here."

Jacob got up from his knees, leaving Fox and Kiba behind. He walked into the kitchen, which was still bathed in morning sunlight. Jacob noticed the clock.

_9:45, huh? Long morning, _Jacob thought, opening the fridge. His blue-green eyes found the tall, black can. Unfortunately, it was the only tall, black can in sight.

_Aww, the last one?_ Jacob wasn't so sure he wanted to give it to the leader of Star Fox anymore. He decided to get a second opinion from Kiba.

"Kiba, it's the last one!" he shouted from the kitchen.

"Give it to him anyway. At the very least it will prevent us from fighting over it in the future!"

_Works for me. Those fights can get nasty,_ Jacob recalled, remembering the time he nearly had his arm broken. Suffice it to say; he didn't get the last Amp that time around.

_And over an energy drink, too. What are we coming too? _He thought with a smile. He accepted his reality with open arms, and would continue to, no matter how weird it got.

"You guys literally fight over the last Amp drink?" Fox wondered, quiet enough that Jacob didn't hear him.

"Yeah. It's kinda sad. I nearly broke Jacob's arm once while we were sparring, though. His dad was not happy," Kiba explained, also out of Jacob's earshot. The fun of the memory put a smile on Kiba's face.

"…You guys are weird," Fox said after a pause.

"What was your first clue? The ass-fire or my furry sweatshirt in the middle of summer?"

"True, but I didn't actually know it was the middle of summer here," Fox pointed out.

"Oh. Right. Duh."

Just then, Jacob sauntered in holding the all-too-familiar sleek black can of the energy drink the two humans knew and loved. Fox eyed it with curiosity. The straight, green logo stood out on top of the black background. A cartoonish flame was over the AMP Energy text. The pull tap on top of the can was primitive, yet familiar.

"Hey, Fox, think fast," Jacob said, tossing the full can at the vulpine.

He did. He caught the can easily, with almost no effort expended. Fox righted the energy drink, then took a furry finger and tried to wedge it between the pull tab and the can itself. Unfortunately, this can was one of those cans where one can't keep a grip on the pull tab, no matter how hard one tries.

"Son of a..." he swore under his breath after attempting to dislodge the pull tab for at least 30 seconds.

"Need help?" Jacob offered, trying to prevent himself from snickering.

To answer Jacob's question, Fox protracted one claw out from his index finger and wedged it under the pull tab. He was met with immediate success, as the pull tab relented almost instantly. The room filled with the characteristic pop-hiss that you get after opening a can of carbonated beverage.

Fox looked at Jacob, the face saying, _Knew I could do it._ Jacob responded by returning to his knees in front of the couch, next to Kiba.

Akamaru continued to prevent Fox from rotating his legs around to give the humans room on the couch. Kiba was utterly convinced that his dog took some kind of sadistic pleasure out of denying the humans couch space, even though he couldn't prove it.

Anyway, Fox reluctantly took a drink. The reaction was instant and exactly what Jacob and Kiba wanted. The vulpine's ears perked up a little, his tail rose and pointed upwards, and his eyes widened in surprise. Both his brain and his vocal cords said the same thing.

"Wow, this is actually pretty good!"

Kiba and Jacob exchanged looks of subtle pleasure.

"Just be careful not to drink too many of those in a short period of time. Weird things will happen," Jacob warned from personal experience. "One time I had three in, like, an hour, and then I couldn't think straight for the rest of the day."

"I doubt that. What about this awesome drink could make you not think straight?" Fox wondered out loud, taking another long drink.

"Dude, trust my buddy here," Kiba vouched. "I actually made the same mistake because I didn't listen to him."

Suddenly, Kiba burst out in laughter. Jacob had a slight hunch why, but it was otherwise completely unexplained. Fortunately, no one need wonder, because Kiba would answer everyone's questions without even being asked.

"My God, my head was a jumbled mess of idiotic observations and hyper thoughts. I thought I was having a freaking seizure!" he said through more bouts of laughter.

Jacob looked at Fox and raised his eyebrows, content that his point had been more or less proved.

"I still don't understand. I think I've had about half this can, and I feel nothing new."

"You will. You will."

Fox rolled his eyes.

_These kits are nice enough, and pretty damn accepting of my existence, _the only awake Lylatian thought. _But I think I'm starting to get sick of them._

He looked to his right and saw his rival still unconscious on the recliner. Seeing the fellow Lylatian, his mind wandered to home. Fox thought of his team, of the terrible jam he had left them in.

_Falco…Slippy…Peppy…I hope you guys are all right…_ He took another long drag of his Amp, although he wished it was a strong beer.

Jacob and Kiba saw the vulpine retreat into silence. Jacob, obviously, was the most worried about this, since he was the Star Fox kid. Sadly, he couldn't read minds, so Jacob couldn't figure out the best way to cheer him up.

_I hate it when people do this to me. I never know how to restart the conversation, cause I'm only good with reactions to other people's sentences, _Jacob thought. It was one of his flaws. He couldn't give proper sympathy to save his life.

Kiba found out that fact not long after he and Jacob met, and while they're friends/brothers now, it was almost not so.

Jacob had made a snide comment about Kiba being unable to return to his dimension and see all his friends again. Not long after, Jacob took a hard punch to the face, and Kiba ran off. Now, it turns out that he just spent the night in the old treehouse in the backyard, but it was one of the longest nights Jacob ever had. He thought he had lost his ninja buddy forever.

And, remembering this, Jacob stayed silent.

Fox swiveled around on the couch, sitting on it like it's a couch and not a bed. Akamaru lost his lap in the process. The dog glared at Fox for a moment, and left the room in a huff.

The vulpine had his back hunched over, elbows on his knees. He looked down at the two silent Earth-ians. Kiba was looking at Jacob worriedly. Jacob accidently made eye contact with Fox, and averted his gaze suddenly.

"What's wrong with you?" Fox asked sympathetically.

"Nothing, man. Nothing," Jacob shot back defensively.

Fox backed off. He stared at the ceiling, not wanting to look any closer. Out of nowhere, Jacob had gotten all prickly, and the red fox couldn't figure out why. He decided it was probably time to try to take his leave of Earth. The two kids were very nice to bring him in and give him a drink despite his appearance, but he was ready to go home.

The thought of Wolf still being trapped crossed his mind.

_No room in a single Arwing for the both of us, _Fox told himself. It was a complete lie, Arwings had a small cargo area in the back for long trips. He reminded himself of this fact, but couldn't convince himself to take Wolf along.

_Lylat will be better off without him, anyway._

"So…I'm thankful for everything. Really, I am. But, I think I'm ready to head back home. Is my Arwing still outside?" Fox said.

"Yeah, in a crumpled heap, but yeah," Kiba replied bluntly, getting up off his knees and moving to open the shade.

"It should be right out—" Kiba cut himself short when he raised the shade enough to see the intersection in front of the house. It wasn't what he saw that shocked him; it was what he didn't see.

The Arwing was not there.

Fox turned around and looked when he heard Kiba's voice cut out. He saw the same exact thing.

There was no Arwing there.

Kiba stared at the scene outside, letting it sink in. Every last trace of the ship's existence was wiped clean. All that was discernible was some charred concrete where the wings and fuselage had been rubbed down by friction. Other than that, it looked like an average T intersection.

"What is it?" Jacob asked, curious. He raised himself up a little so he could see between Kiba and Fox's shocked, still forms. He saw the same empty scene, the same average summer morning.

"Well?" Fox asked, feeling as if he'd just been pranked.

Kiba jumped down and rushed for the remote, turning the power on as soon as humanly possible. The TV was still tuned to CNN, which is exactly what they wanted.

A reporter appeared to be standing on the nearby corner of Manderson and Terrace Drive, which is about a block from Jacob's house. The camera faced where the Arwing had been not 40 minutes ago. She talked calmly in her plain red suit with a black undershirt, but the displayed headline described the event well enough.

_Ship to be studied,_ it read. Underneath it, in smaller text, the words _Crashed UFO on its way to military base._

_Well that was fast, _Jacob and Kiba thought simultaneously.

"Nevermind, then..." Kiba said, looking at Fox with a nervous grin. The reporter droned on with her newscast. Nobody paid any attention to her.

Fox sighed. The universe was starting to get on his nerves. He rubbed his temples in exasperation.

"Fine, whatever, where can I catch a plane off this rock, then?" the vulpine asked flatly. Jacob and Kiba looked at each other, knowing very well that Fox just shoved the humans into a minefield.

"Uh…how long are you willing to wait…?" Jacob asked shakily.

Fox thought about this for a little while. He remembered stories about how public space transportation was a real pain in the ass. He also remembered laughing at them because he could hop in his Arwing and go wherever, whenever.

_Oh, the irony, _the vulpine thought.

"A few days, maybe a week. Just get me on the quickest plane out of here, please," he requested.

Jacob and Kiba looked at each other again. They felt kind of bad for Fox because he was so deluded, but hey, they didn't plant that idea.

The silliness of Fox's statement slowly crept through the human's brains. Their facial expressions started to change. First, the eyes changed their angle just slightly. Second, a smile appeared on both their faces. Ever so slowly at first, the smiles grew bigger. They got bigger faster and faster until their lungs just couldn't hold it anymore.

Both of them burst out in laughter.

Not the calm, inside laughter like during school, no. This was loud, obnoxious, gut-busting laughter.

They fell over on the floor and started rolling around.

Fox saw this display, and…to say the least…he was a bit…_displeased._ His ears flattened in anger as he shouted out a very audible-

"What the hell?!"

The creatures continued their display of finding something extremely funny. Fox couldn't even tell if they had heard him. One of his paws involuntarily jerked towards his holster, but his consciousness stopped it.

"Seriously, guys, what the hell is so funny about all this?"

"Hold on, hold...ahahahaHAHA!" Jacob tried to hold his laughter long enough to spurt out a complete sentence, but it wasn't possible. Instead, he held one finger up as if saying "One second", and he let his laughing fit subsist on its own.

It took a while, at least a minute for that to happen. Even to this day, Jacob still marvels at how Fox kept his cool through all that. He seemed to be right on the cliff of cracking and yet, he never jumped.

Anyway, the teenager's laughing fit petered out, and Jacob was left breathing heavily. Exhausted, yet pleased, he was finally ready to explain a few things to the angry vulpine.

"Ok, first of all, first of all, I'm not talking days," Jacob began, cheap smile still on his face.

"Months? Travel that backed up, or what?" Fox queried, a little shocked.

"Don't get me started again, Fox," Jacob said, letting the chuckles leak out before they built up again in his respiratory system.

Fox still had no idea what the furless creature was getting at. His face still showed his confused slash angry demeanor.

"Ok, ok, I'm not talking months, either."

"As long as I get home in the end," Fox said matter-of-factly.

"Fox, dude," Jacob attempted to explain for the third time, still fighting back laughter. "You're not getting it, are you? I'm not talking days, weeks, months, or even years, kid. Colonizing planets, high speed space travel, stuff like that hasn't even been invented yet. Fox, I'm talking centuries or most likely millennia until this stuff even becomes relevant outside of science fiction! Face it, man. You're stranded."

He stepped back, letting all that sink in.

_Wha...What? I'm...completely stranded? No, no, no, no, no, this can't be! _Fox thought. His mind was a blur of denial and anxious rage, even though his face didn't show it. On the outside, the Lylatian was staring out and towards the ground, eyes wider than usual.

Kiba got up off the floor, finally finished with his own date with humor. The scene before his eyes was certainly different than when he tuned out. No longer was Jacob taking advantage of the vulpine's confusion; on the other hand, it looked more like Jacob had finally broke the news.

_Well, crap, I wanted to help with that,_ Kiba thought. He crawled over to the still unfolding drama by the couch. Jacob was looking at Fox solemnly, but Fox seemed to be done acknowledging everyone else's presence. Kiba had no idea what Jacob had told him, but it seemed to be extremely serious, because Fox just sat there staring into space with a shocked expression.

"Dude, what did you say to him?" Kiba whispered fiercely, unable to stand any suspense.

Jacob didn't hear his ninja buddy. He was too busy trying to give proper sympathy. He wanted to put a consoling hand on his furry friend's shoulder, but he was too caught up in awkwardly wondering if that would go too far. Jacob knew, however, that he couldn't just sit there in silence, watching Fox's dreams to get back home get crushed faster than a UPS truck crushes an aluminum can.

_God damn it, how do I do this right? Why can't I do this right? Why do I have this freaking curse on me? _Jacob yelled at himself in his mind. He broadcast his pissed off thoughts to any telepathic who might listen.

Now, Kiba wasn't a telepathic, but he had spent his entire life around people with troubled pasts and silly flaws. It seemed to be a Konoha epidemic. In this respect, it gave Kiba the ability to recognize an internal quandary with almost no effort.

And the only relevant flaw that Jacob had was very obvious.

"Jacob, stop overthinking things. Don't let your brain tell you what to say. Let your heart tell you what to say," Kiba whispered softly, hopefully out of Fox's earshot.

Jacob heard those three sentences all too well.

_I know he's right…but…come on, heart, what do I say? How do I help him? What do I do? _Jacob thought. He was falling into the same trap, and he knew it.

_Ok, ok, ok, calm down. Deep breaths…deeeeep breaths…_

He took one last deep breath before letting his vocal chords take control of his speech.

"Fox, I'm sorry…really, I am…but you were going to find out eventually…and…I wanted to save you the trouble…" Jacob explained simply.

Fox heard this, but didn't care. He refused to accept he was stranded. He refused to accept that there was no way home. He absolutely refused to give up.

His father had taught him better than that.

_I still miss you, Dad._

"No. I'm not stranded. We are gonna go and get my ship back, damn the consequences," he said confidently, staring the furless creatures down as hard as he could. There seemed to be nothing that could change his mind. He chugged down the rest of his Amp

Jacob stared back just as hard. He already knew all the things wrong with that plan, and he was prepared to practically spell them out if he had to. For you see, Jacob wouldn't let anything get in the way of his chance to be brothers with a real furry.

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and started.

"Fox, if I may. Let me tell you all the things wrong with what you've just suggested. Number one"—Jacob held up one finger—"We're just two kids. I don't have any combat experience, and Kiba over here is only good with hand-to-hand combat. If we're going to chase after a heavily guarded ship, we'll need more than that.

"Number two"—Jacob held up another finger—"We don't even know where it's going. This is a big country. It could be going in any number of directions to any military compound in these United States."

"Probably Area 51, the most heavily guarded compound in America," Kiba supplied.

"Good, that makes the most sense," Jacob continued. "Let's assume that's the case. That's about…what would you say, Kiba, 1300 miles from here? Give or take?"

"Sounds about right," Kiba confirmed.

"Okay. Number three"—another finger went up—"That's a long way. Neither of us knows how to drive, and the government wouldn't let you into an airport for any reason. Number four"—a fourth finger goes up—"People must patrol that site 24/7. They're probably ordered to shoot trespassers on sight. I wouldn't doubt it if snipers were posted around, too.

"Five"—Jacob held up an open palm—"Even if we managed to infiltrate the base, we still don't know where they'd be housing your ship. Six"—Jacob started with his right hand—"your ship might not even be repaired. We humans wouldn't know where to start. Seven"—up went another finger—"Provided it was repaired, and we found it, we have no guarantee that it's even near a usable airstrip. It may be miles underground for all we know.

"Eight"—Jacob held up the eighth finger—"If we manage to get off the ground, they'd probably shoot us down with either a ground-based weapon or an F/A-18. Not pleasant. Nine"—yet another finger rose—"Even if you got into space, which way would you go? I doubt you could look up in the sky and decisively pick out your home planet even if you tried. And, ten"—both palms were open now—"unless you have some sort of cheat to go faster than light or something, it would take you horrendously long to get back home. Most likely longer than your lifespan."

"If you want, I can take off my shoes and start counting ten more reasons, but you're a smart guy, Fox. You know the truth," Jacob finished, out of breath.

Fox blinked.

_Ugh, this kit knows his stuff. I know he's right, but…god DAMN it! _Fox clenched his fists furiously, crushing the empty Amp can he never put down. Hearing the sound, he looked at his right paw; at the twisted aluminum squished underneath his fingers. He chucked the can straight down. It bounced off his communications headpiece and came to rest a couple feet in front of the humans.

Jacob and Kiba backed away slowly, not wanting to get caught in the crossfire. Fox stared out of the window, snarling almost silently. His tail jerked up and down, bouncing against the floor and couch base, then coming back up.

Jacob regretted having to do what he just did. In taking down Fox's confidence, he had let his own arrogance flare out uncontrolled. And not knowing whether Fox was pissed at Jacob, at the universe, or both of them just made the human feel that much worse.

Kiba felt like he had been shunted to the sidelines, and he wasn't sure how to feel about that. Jacob knew so much more about furrydom and Star Fox that Kiba was more than willing to let Jacob take the reins, but…he felt like he could do more. He wanted to make it up to Jacob for all the stupidity that he had shown during the Friday morning. The problem was, Kiba didn't know where to start.

A thump indicated that Fox had punched the back of the couch in rage.

_Eh, I'm gonna wing it, _Kiba thought, shrugging his shoulders

"Fox, listen. I know how you feel. It may be hard to believe, but I had to go through the same thing. Exactly one year ago, actually," Kiba said.

"What do you mean? You're not one of my kind, you're one of them," Fox growled, still looking out the window.

"I figured you'd say that," Kiba said with a confident smile. "Let me show you just how different I am."

Kiba stood up. He stretched a bit before putting a hand to his mouth and calling "Akamaru!"

Almost immediately, the medium-sized white dog trotted out of the hallway. He didn't look pleased with the interruption of his sleep, but he never ignored his master.

"Ready to show this kid why we're awesome?" Kiba asked Akamaru.

He replied by barking happily and wagging his tail furiously.

"Alright, Jacob, are you ready?" Kiba asked.

"Just make it as painless as possible," he replied, fear in his voice. Kiba had done a very similar demonstration 363 days ago, and Jacob had been the target then, too. He never expected to see it again. Jacob shuddered, remembering the pain.

Before Jacob could try to mentally prepare himself, Kiba had already started the motions. His arms were crossed like an X, and his face had contorted to one of extreme concentration. Straight out of his usually short fingernails grew claws, and his eyes grew even more beastly (Jacob still marveled at how that was possible, they were already slits to begin with). Energy seemed to eminate from the shinobi.

Fox almost didn't waste the energy to look, but when he did, he left his anger behind. The tan one seemed to be..._evolving_. It was incredible, but Fox wasn't entirely sure what was so special about it. If Kiba could do it, what prevented anyone else from doing it?

Nonetheless, the vulpine kept watching.

Kiba slowly moved down on all fours. Akamaru, sensing his cue, hopped onto his master's back. Kiba, in return, shouted four very important words that changed the entire mood of the room.

"Man Beast Clone Jutsu!"

A puff of white smoke clouded everyone's vision for a few long seconds. Fox moved his muzzle away, unsure on if he could breathe in the smoke. Jacob knew otherwise, he was just scared cause it meant he would be assaulted with a barrage of fists shortly.

The smoke cleared, and right there, precariously balanced on the real Kiba's back...

...was a clone.

A real clone, down to every last feature.

Even with all their advancement, the Cornerians still hadn't perfected cloning.

And Fox knew this all too well.

_How the hell is that possible? Where's the machine, where's the electricity, where's all the scientists? Thousands of years of technological advancement, and for what? For some kit to come along and beat us too it without any help?_

But Fox's odd, jealous train of thought was interrupted by eight more words, duly shouted by Kiba.

They made Jacob's spine tingle and his stomach drop.

"Ninja Art of Beast Mimicry: Fang Over Fang!" the two Kibas shouted.

The clones seemed to tornado towards the hapless Jacob. One of them dropped a small purple ball, and the room was filled with smoke once again, but grey smoke this time.

Fox's perception was utterly confused. He couldn't make sense of the events before his emerald eyes. The thick smoke made him cough. A darker grey blur raced diagonally across his field of view. A groan of pain came from the epicenter of the smoke. It was faint due to the noise of Kiba swirling around, but it was unequivocally Jacob's. Fox kind of wanted to step in, but he couldn't see his paws before his face, much less Jacob's body.

Similarly, Jacob couldn't see Fox, and was actually glad no one could see him. He was being struck from all sides at all intensities, and it hurt like a true bitch.

Soon enough, the agitated smoke began to dissipate. The grey wall soon turned into a film revealing three silhouettes, two standing upright, one curled up on the floor. The grey film turned into a membrane, then disappeared altogether. The two Kibas stood over a writhing Jacob, looking at the vulpine smugly. Another small spurt of white smoke, and it was back to Kiba and his white dog. They ambled towards the couch and sat down on the opposite end of Fox, reclining back as if resting after a jog.

Jacob continued to clutch his stomach and moan.

Fox sat in awed silence, eyes glued to Jacob's writhing form.

"Dude, why did you do that?" Fox asked.

"Cause no one else on Earth can," Kiba replied matter-of-factly. "Hell, I'm not even supposed to exist."

"What do you mean? You clearly exist," Fox said. He knew he just kept asking the same questions over and over, but did he really have a choice?

"Yeah, but I'm not supposed to. As far as practically everyone outside of Omaha is concerned, I'm just a fictional character."

Fox was completely confused again. He hated that feeling.

"He's right," Jacob said weakly through gritted teeth. "Go get that manga volume from our room...prove it to him..."

"What did you think I was gonna do? Go gorge myself with ice cream?"

"You already kicked my ass...no need to rub it in..." Jacob still didn't move from the floor.

Kiba shrugged his shoulders. He left the living room with that unsure confidence one gets when one might have gone too far. Akamaru didn't follow. Instead, he sauntered over to Jacob and started nuzzling his face. It tickled his nose.

"Hehehe, ok, I get it, you're sorry," Jacob said, starting to feel better. Nobody could resist Akamaru's innocent charm. Jacob scratched his canine buddy's ears.

Fox looked on curiously. Akamaru continued to confuse the furry. Jacob scratched the dog's ears, and he seemed to...enjoy it. Of course, citizens of Corneria enjoyed it, too, but it was a social taboo. It had a secret pleasure to it, that it was almost considered to be like fapping. But here; here in this technologically primitive world, where no talking and walking people had fur or tails, it was acceptable. They were almost like pets.

Little did Fox know, he was right on the mark.

Jacob sat up, groaning melodramatically. He stretched his various limbs as if waking up from a nap. He noticed Fox was staring directly at him. The vulpine looked concerned, but there was an undertone to his expression that Jacob couldn't place.

"Are you ok, Jacob?" Fox asked.

"Yeah. I'll be sore for a little while, but yeah, I'm fine."

Kiba walked back in, carrying a small, orange and white book. The word _Naruto _was printed boldly in orange on the front. Jacob crawled over to the couch as Kiba sat down next to Fox. He started flipping through the pages, looking for the best example of...well...himself.

_Page 164_, Jacob remembered from a year ago. _It was one hell of a stressful moment to explain all that to him, but he's adjusted nicely._

"Aha!" Kiba said, finding what he was looking for. "See, look right here."

Fox followed Kiba's finger down to a black-and-white drawing..._of Kiba? What in the name of Andross' back hair?_

"Pretty weird, huh?" Kiba said as if the whole thing meant nothing. "I'll tell you, I barely believed it myself."

"Yeah, and my scars tell the tale," Jacob remembered.

"I keep telling you I'm sorry."

"And I keep telling you to stop worrying about it, yet you never seem to let it go."

"You think I'm going to ignore that pain I caused you, man? All because I was in disbelief?"

"It was completely understandable. Sure, it was painful, but understandable."

Kiba rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, I was busy doing absolutely nothing when a random breeze kicked up," Kiba began to explain. Jacob let the argument that happened just two seconds earlier slide. For Kiba was once again telling his side of the story.

"I didn't think much of it, weather is weird sometimes, y'know? But it just kept getting stronger and stronger. Soon it grew from a breeze, to a gale, to typhoon-strength winds. I sent chakra to my hands, trying to keep a strong grip on the ground and save myself from whatever evil the winds wanted to take me to. Sadly, fate had other plans."

Jacob glared at Kiba. The only Earth-native in the room knew very well that Kiba was enjoying his time here.

Kiba didn't notice and continued his story unhindered.

"A power pole flew out of the distance, aimed directly at my head. There was nothing I could do. Next thing I knew, my mouth tasted of cheese and meat, Jacob here was screaming and clutching his finger, and three other kids were laughing their asses off.

"Long story short, in about a minute, everything I knew was gone, and I had to relearn practically everything. It wasn't easy, but Jacob here has been a big help."

"That's right, Fox. You see, I have experience with matters like this," Jacob added smugly. "You'll find that being stranded with Kiba and I won't be so bad."

"I think I'll just take your word for that," Fox said, setting down the _Naruto _volume.

"Do you have a choice, Fox, or do I have to explain the ten reasons again?" Jacob half-joked.

"No," Fox sighed. "I don't."

"That's more like it. Like I said, it won't be so bad. I wouldn't get too optimistic, but with your ship in the custody of the best scientists we've got, we might have easy space travel sooner than I predicted."

"You're probably right, it's just going to be hard, not seeing my friends-scratch that, not seeing any of my own kind for the rest of my life."

"Do you think I don't miss my family and friends back in Konoha?" Kiba protested. Seeing the confusion creep onto Fox's animal-ish features again, Kiba clarified, "Konoha is my hometown, Fox. My bad. I miss them every day. But, I had to accept that I was stuck, and move on. In time, you'll have to do the same thing. And we'll be here for you."

Fox looked sideways solemnly. Even if that Kiba wasn't the same Kiba in that comic book, it was written on his face that he spoke from experience. For the sixth time in maybe twenty or thirty minutes, Fox thought, _For a couple of kits, these two are crazy knowledgeable._

"Besides," Kiba continued, trying to lighten up the solemn mood he had just created. "At least you'll have Wolf to keep you company."

"Yeah...in case you didn't know, him and I aren't exactly on the best of terms..." Fox said.

"At least he's one of your kind," Kiba argued weakly.

"Yeah, but we're rivals. We kind of...hate each other's tails."

Jacob and Kiba were confused at the odd expression Fox just used.

"Lemme guess," Jacob began, trying to get clarification. "'To hate one's tail' means an expression of extreme hatred?"

Fox nodded slowly and deliberately, as if it should have been obvious.

"I thought so," Jacob confirmed.

"What is he doing here, anyway?" Fox wondered out loud.

"You tell me. I was just trying to get you out of your wreckage of a ship when this joker literally just falls out of the sky. He landed right on top of me. My spine still hurts a little..." Jacob complained, rubbing his back.

"That sounds stupid, Jacob," Fox criticized.

Jacob shrugged his shoulders. "I never said it made sense. I just told you what I know."

"He isn't lying. I was standing about three feet behind him when it happened," Kiba vouched. "It was weird, but kind of funny."

"Yeah, it was. Anyway, you'll just have to ask him yourself when he wakes up. Cause I don't know what else to tell you," Jacob told his vulpine buddy.

"Speaking of Wolf, can I ask you a favor?" Fox said.

Jacob and Kiba exchanged glances once more. "Sure, why not? What is it?"

"Would you mind disarming him? Taking his blaster? I'd prefer him to not have it when he wakes up and sees me," Fox requested.

"Sure, but if you don't mind me asking," Jacob said. "Why don't you want to do it?"

"If he catches you taking it, he won't be as angry."

The two humans realized they were just being used as bait.

"Well, at least you're honest," Kiba pointed out.

"No worries. If we could get away with messing with his cybernetic eye for fifteen minutes, this should be a breeze," Jacob remembered.

"Wait. You actually got away with stealing his eye?" Fox asked in amazement.

"Yeah, but don't tell Wolf that," Jacob said as the humans shared a chuckle.

"Impressive..." Fox murmured under his breath.

Jacob took the couple steps required to reach the recliner where Wolf was still out cold. Kiba remained behind, watching Wolf's face closely for any signs of movement or consciousness.

The holster itself was easy to find; it was strapped around the lupine's right thigh. The trick was going to be keeping Wolf unaware that his blaster has been stolen for the longest time possible.

What there was no trick to, however, was the act of taking the blaster. It was simple enough to open the oblong pouch, reach in, and take the Lylatian blaster. When it saw the light of day, however, Jacob couldn't help but laugh. Not only was the piece of technology colored green and purple, a weird, organically curved blade stuck out from beneath the barrel. It was the same length as the pistol itself, at least. Jacob found the odd design highly amusing.

"Wow. Who the hell puts a bayonet on a pistol?" he asked between laughs.

"Uh, apparently Wolf does," Kiba replied, finding the design funny as well.

Fox hadn't noticed or thought about it before, but the creatures were right. There was something a little illogical about putting a blade on a blaster like that. Even he started laughing after a little bit.

"Alright, I'll go hide this now," Jacob announced. He exited the living room and headed back towards his room once more. Not wanting to spend much time away from the furries in the living room, he chose a rather simple hiding spot at first. Yep, you guessed it. On top of the bookshelf.

Jacob found his way back to the living room, where Kiba and Fox were laughing at something.

"Hey, what's so funny?" Jacob asked innocently.

"Oh, I just told Fox that joke about the bad golfer and the bad skydiver," Kiba explained.

"Oh man, that's a classic. Whack, damn it; damn it, whack, that just never gets old."

"It was a great joke, I'll admit, but I have an even better one," Fox said with a grin. "Did you hear about the pilot who got his left arm and left leg cut off?"

"It's like I've heard this one before, but...no, I haven't," Jacob rambled.

"That's ok, he's all right now!"

"Ahaha, I see what you did there," Jacob said, laughing pretty loudly right along with Kiba. "See, you'll be fine here."

Jacob thought he was doing well, and he was. Until he made the mistake of saying that sentence...and scratching Fox's ear.

Suddenly, the amount of tension in the room skyrocketed.

Jacob might not have realized what he did wrong, but Kiba sure did. Jacob just performed a deadly sin by scratching Fox's ears. And the look on Fox's face, the forced smile, the angered eyes, Kiba knew blood could spill if someone didn't intervene.

"Uh...Jacob? You should stop..." he said, rubbing his neck.

It seemed right then that Jacob noticed Fox's half-psychopathic expression, and he laid off almost immediately.

_Well, obviously there's something I don't know, _Jacob thought, embarrassed at the faux pas he wasn't even aware he had committed until now. In fact, he was still a little fuzzy on the details. Although, even if it angered Fox greatly, his fur was incredibly soft. Jacob reveled that feeling, even if it didn't last.

"Thank you," Fox said to Kiba through gritted fangs.

"What was that about?" Jacob wondered.

"Weren't you listening ear-oh right, you were in the bathroom when he explained it," Kiba answered. He leaned over and whispered into Jacob's ear, "Petting and stuff isn't socially acceptable where he comes from. Some kind of culture thing. It's really only reserved in families or best friends."

"Oh..." Jacob said, nodding his head. The word 'family' jarred his memory on Fox's situation, and he suddenly discovered why Fox's face had gone all psychopathic for a few moments. Fox didn't have a family anymore. By scratching the vulpine's ear, he had dug a huge hole for himself.

"Oh, OH, oh my God, I'm sorry, Fox. I didn't know..." Jacob attempted to apologize.

Fox calmed down relatively quickly.

"Whatever, just don't do it again..." Fox ordered.

"Jeez, things got awkward really fast," Kiba noted. "You had to scratch his ears, didn't you?"

"Well, I didn't know. It's not my fault my digestive system decided to play firefighter while he explained some stuff."

"Please don't talk about that again," Fox begged. "Let's just move on, ok? For brothers, you two seem to fight a lot."

"Kiba's always been a bit...confrontational and hot-tempered," Jacob explained euphemistically.

"Oh, like you aren't?"

"Confrontational, yes. Hot-tempered, no," Jacob clarified.

A sudden, guttural growl silenced the three of them. The two humans turned around slowly, knowing who was causing the growling, but afraid to be reassured. When Wolf entered their field of vision, they noticed he was twitching randomly. One paw twitched towards his stomach, then up towards his muzzle.

"Not again," Kiba and Jacob complained quietly. They didn't want to deal with Lylatian vomit again.

Luckily, they didn't have to. Wolf's paw covered the end of his muzzle, and his cheeks bulged pretty big, but he appeared to be able to swallow the vomit back down. His lips smacked at the disgusting taste. His eyes did not open.

His right paw covered his good eye and Wolf groaned again, signaling that he was suffering a severe headache as well. However, after several moments of Wolf clutching his temples and rocking back and forth, his eyes opened.

A purple iris was clearly visible between two of his fingers.

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**A/N: Error 404: Request for Reviews Not Found. Please check your internet connection and try again.**

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**(reverse psychology, please work, please work...)**

**Chapter 5 projected date: October 31st**


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